The Process

[Thinkingman85]

I have been on Prozac for three and a half weeks and going to weekly therapy sessions for five weeks. I fell into a deep depression five years ago. I tried to get out of it for five years through the right actions, but it didn't work. After taking the Prozac, I am feeling better every day. I feel like I am being reconnected to myself (even the aspects darkened by depression). I believe that if I stay on this path of medication, therapy, learning, and taking it easy, I will one day be back to my whole self. It's like I am a dead person in the process of being resurrected slowly. However, I was never dead in the first place... just very depressed. Right now, it feels like I am having to relive my past to get past it. I am concerned that I am going to come to very trying times as I get better. I will have to face memories that have been darkened by depression and I think they will probably be horrific. I sort of feel like I am gong through withdrawal by facing my demons. Does this sound like a natural process? All the best.

 

[Changing4Best]

I am concerned that I am going to come to very trying times as I get better. I will have to face memories that have been darkened by depression and I think they will probably be horrific. I sort of feel like I am gong through withdrawal by facing my demons. Does this sound like a natural process? All the best.

From my experience, we don't relive it as bad as the original scene was when we go through it in therapy. The pain is relieved as we go, though we may cry or even scream or be angry, our Therapists know how much we can take and get us through safely. We also do deal with the present and how it is being effected by our pasts.

So fear not! Be strong, be brave, your Therapist WILL get you through this. Your medicine(s) will help smooth the way too. And you will go through it. YOU WILL SURVIVE.

Sometimes your Therapist can give you homework to help you too. Also, reading things from others here on these Forums is very theraputic, as well as writing your own Trauma Diary (there is a section here especially for this that is called TRAUMA DIARIES).

 

[Changing4Best]

I wrote my Trauma Diary here and actually gave the web address of it to my Therapist so that she could read it. I asked her to do so even. And she did. She has not commented upon it directly, but she did say that she has read it which was all I wanted. I thought it might help to guide her as to how best to proceed with my therapy.

Glad you liked my first response, Thinking Man.

 

[Thinkingman85]

Yes, writing in a diary seems to be a good way to let your emotions out. I might give it a try for experimenting. My path is uphill, so more options seem to be open. Hopefully, you will develop a stronger bond with your therapist. Thanks for the response :)

 

[Changing4Best]

Just starting out with a new Therapist is rough, I've only seen my present one 3 times now, if I recall, and I only can afford to see her 2 times a month. I see that you are just starting out too, so we are in this at similar points.

I've had other therapists before though, which for one or another reason did not work out. One reason was that I moved to another state, another was that my Therapist left that practice when I was getting therapy and moved to another practice. And one Therapist I just didn't really like, she seemed so cold and uncaring. She always crossed her arms in front of her during the whole session for like 10 sessions in a row. It wasn't cold in her office or anything, so it made no sense to me. (Crossing one's arms in front of one is not a friendly gesture, to say the least).

I DO like my present Therapist though, thankfully. I hope it works out that I can stay with her!

Is this your first time in therapy?

 

[Thinkingman85]

Yes, it's my first time in therapy. I have gone to five sessions so far. One thing that I notice which is reassuring is that my therapist is open. He probably follows Carl Roger's unconditional positive regard approach. You're right about the therapist crossing her arms. That is defensive body language. As I continue with the session, I'm going to open up more and more. It is a positive experience and I'm glad that I'm doing this. :)