Poll What Is The Cause Of Your PTSD?

[Abstract]

I was interested to see what percentages of PTSD fall under the different stressors. I have not enabled multiple answers as I thought it may get too confusing and unclear. So if there are many of these then pick the first most likely cause rather than a later stressor that set off the symptoms or compounded the trauma. Many of us have delayed onset too but I imagine most have a sense of the first real cause.

 

[safenow]

Just so you are aware, there can be more than one event that causes ptsd. Childhood abuse over a period of years can start it off, but as a child, you don't know those symptoms are not normal. Assault can add a different set of triggers that activate your ptsd. Does that make sense? Then when you add death onto that, accident, war: foreign or domestic, etc. My goodness. It can get really tricky for a lot of us.

The first break-in of my home and captivity for a few days set mine off since afterwards I was hyper-vigilant. The sounds, smells set me into a frenzy of fear so bad I could not move. When someone got too close to my body I jumped back or sideways. My arms would fly up to protect my face. I'd scream or cry over just about nothing. If someone made the mistake of touching me when I didn't know they were there, I'd attack them. I thought I was going to be killed if I didn't kill them first. Many years later, after I'd learned how to ground and get it together, I was in a 7-11 and it was held up by a gunman who killed everyone but me. He thought I was dead. He shot me in the leg and because of my past abuse I knew to lie very still til he was gone. Reactivated my ptsd and it took a long time to calm down again. Over the course of my life, I've healed enough to function, then had another trauma and it comes back.

They say you can only die once, but I'll tell you what, it's not the death that scares me. It's the living without being able to defend myself that is death to me.

Sorry to ramble.
safenow

 

[Abstract]

Safenow,

Sorry that all of that happened to you. These things should never occur. I agree that not being able to defend oneself or being at someone's mercy and being alive is worse.

Thanks for your thoughts. I have clarified what I was thinking as a result.

 

[Britt.f7]

I had to check the adult rape/sexual assault, though mine occurred in my childhood and in my teens. The one in childhood was my babysitter. The one in my teens was by a group of boys. So not adult, but not child abuse either, so I wasn't sure.

Interesting survey.

 

[Abstract]

Hi Britt,
Very sorry that happened to you. Hugs. I think I made a few errors in how I put it together actually. I have even started doubting my own now! I would personally include yours under childhood abuse. I probably should have allowed multiple checks too.

 

[The Albatross]

Early trauma is all I know. I honestly can't say which ones "caused" the PTSD. I just know that if we were taking score of traumas I could click four of them, and if the "abduction" one included attempted abductions I could click off 5. That's kinda bad and sad isn't it? :O_o: For that reason I didn't participate in the poll. Though I find it amazing that some people know. I'm rather clueless about it.

 

[Shellbell]

This was difficult as I've had child abuse from my parents and child sexual abuse, then what is classed as abduction and forced captivity from 16 including rape every day for 4 years. I don't definitely know what caused my delayed onset PTSD and I was still technically not an adult when the captivity started, so I clicked the childhood sexual abuse one.

 

[Abstract]

Hi Albatross,

I am sorry. That is very sad. Technically I could tick multiple ones too but I know certain things affected me more. I think what you and Safenow said is the main fault with the poll. I actually thought about my own and am not that sure anymore either. I so often get stumped in polls when I have to think of what caused anything or when the symptoms started. Its all a blur.

I suppose there is no way of knowing definitely which caused PTSD initially if there are multiple traumas and if it started early in life but maybe flashbacks tell us some of that? And the way I think of it is that the earliest probably normally makes us vulnerable to anything that comes after.

Maybe you would have got PTSD from each of those separately if only one happened or maybe not but there is no way of ever knowing that.

 

[Abstract]

Shellbell,

I think you are a child at 16 and I would also think of it as childhood abuse. It sounds like that included all types of abuse too in the environment you were in. And I guess there is no way of knowing if you would have developed PTSD from what came before that or not but regardless you know that that 4 years did it.

 

[The Albatross]

I suppose there is no way of knowing definitely which caused PTSD initially if there are multiple severe traumas and if it started early in life but maybe flashbacks tell us some of that? And the way I think of it is that the earliest probably normally makes us vulnerable to anything that comes after.

I was fortunate to have read a book on a bookshelf in Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) once (though I tried to find it and buy it but couldn't remember the name, I had put the book back for others to read). Basically they said that some issues that may have occurred before about 2-2 and a half... we won't have words for, and may not remember. It set my mind somewhat at ease. I stopped pressing hard for validation and started accepting that I may never exactly know what the beginning of my difficulty was. The book was a Hazelden. That's all I know.

 

[Abstract]

Albatross,

Nothing happened to me that early and I can only imagine how impossible it would be to make any sense of all this when it does happen that early. Or anything under 3 or 4 actually. That is the beginning of our development as a human being. The vulnerability of baby is total and I imagine the damage immeasurable.

And being pre verbal totally excludes there being language for it or an ability to have a concept of what happened or how we felt. Its bad enough when it is any type of childhood trauma as we are we do not yet have a full identity.

Maybe you don't have to have absolutes with this stuff. I think early trauma like that would be devastating regardless.

But you are fighting back so credit to you! :)

 

[The Albatross]

I thinks that's why I lean hard on unconditional self acceptance, other acceptance and world acceptance. I have little validation for what happened at that time to work with... except that I know it was domestic violence (my dad was abusing my mother). There was some scarey stuff happening in our home at that time. But regardless, it's up to me to learn how to cope so in my own akward way, I do try to do that. Thanks.