Poll Have You Ever Had Survival Sex?

[Philippa]

I was working in a regular job, and through the holiday period they had no work for me. It was three days until my rent was due and I needed money. The cat needed food and so did I. I had ended up in a massage place that was really an unlicensed brothel, a year ago (I actually thought I was going for a normal massage job and did not find out the nature of the place until I was already in there.) so I've had a bit of experience.

It's been a crazy year for me in the massage industry. I've worked in this sort of job, and then I've also done normal massage in a day spa...where I was treated like absolute shit and attacked, and accused of violently assaulting the manager (which never happened) who was a NURSE, in the Wellness Industry. I've learnt that this is actually not uncommon for psychos to be running "Wellness" based day spas. They usually are not that well themselves.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I was working in a regular job, and through the holiday period they had no work for me. It was three days until my rent was due and I needed money. The cat needed food and so did I.

That was pretty much my story too.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I know I almost cried the first time while I was taking a shower before meeting him. Almost.

He spent awhile just talking. He was clearly very lonely. So I guess the sex part was easier after that. I went back to my 'training' and it went okay.

 

[Philippa]

I've often wondered how I would feel if I ever had to have sex for money? I did almost become an escort when I was homeless a few years ago, but I found call centre work instead, which was decent paying, but boring.

I could not envision it at the time. I guess that is the thing about this industry...once you are in it, and you've done a few "harmless" things, it doesn't seem like much to do something else after a while...and then something else...

I will probably have sex for money at some point...but I will be very choosy who I do it with, if it ever comes down to that, and it will not be cheap. I don't need the money that badly right now, so it's not something I am considering. I am not greedy like some of the other women I work with...who will literally do anything for money.

But again, I don't judge these women. Many are asian, and were probably sold into the sex trade at young ages, and groomed as you were Ayesha. They are not just supporting themselves, they are sending money back to Vietnam and Malaysia, to their mothers and families. This is all they've ever known.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I've often wondered how I would be if I ever had to have sex for money?

I think you mean 'never' here right?

Thought of that too. I have no idea. It's not something that can be unlearned I know that.

 

[Philippa]

No, I meant ever. I've never had sexual intercourse for money as yet. I've only ever given hand relief and done body slides. Sorry, I thought I was clear about that in my earlier posts. The sex I had to survive was for comfort mainly.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I understand. I am glad you have not had to do that.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

This topic is so tiring but it is so wonderful to talk about. I feel like I am accepting myself even more.

 

[Philippa]

Me too...thankyou.

 

[Philippa]

It's always good to talk through things that you aren't normally able to speak about. It's been helpful to me too, and insightful to read other posts as well. It's helping me understand better how some people can do things to survive that others may not be able to bring themselves to...based on their backgrounds and training.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Not picking on you...you just made me think of it...

based on their backgrounds and training.

Yes, I had training if you want to call it that. But my background...white girl from good neighborhood. Kids used to call our bus 'the rich kid' bus. My family had/has money.

And yet...I did that.

Something must be wrong with me. Husband says it's like the domino effect. Once something bad happens it makes you more vulnerable to other bad stuff. He's probably right.

 

[Philippa]

My family had money as well. We lived in the richest suburb in my hometown and had a big house with all the luxuries. The training I was referring to though was mainly what you mentioned before as 'grooming', though I could have chosen a better word for it.

My father paid for me to have piano lessons as a child, he was determined that I would never have to take a regular job and could work in a piano bar or something classy like that. I'm sure he'd be deeply disappointed, shocked and ...well, shocked to see what I am doing for money right now.

A part of me wonders if I subconsciously ended up here in a way to give them both the big middle finger? I don't think that is the truth though...i just needed money for rent and food, and I needed it fast.