Goal For The Day

[Deleted member 12723]

Go and get our taxes done, go food shopping. Take out the trash after I clean the cat box. Take a shower and get frappes. Relax.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Change of plans, not getting the taxies done today. Going food shopping and doing the wash. Take out the trash and do the cat box on another day. Oh well. Go with the flow right. i took my anxiety meds because I was getting antsy. I hope it helps.

 

[MissMacD]

One of the hardest days of my life yet - fighting with the welfare office who are my absolute last resort and keep trying to find ways to avoid helping me. I cried so much today - I went to the food bank for the first time in my life. Those people were so nice to me and invited me back tomorrow to cook a meal with them. I thought I'd hit my rock bottom financially but apparently I can go lower.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

MissMacD. I have gone thru times of abject poverty. I was without a home for a short time. I had to go on welfare and get food stamps and go to the food banks. I was so grateful they were there. They helped me to survive.

You will get through this. It is painful to be so desperately needy and have to beg for food. It just makes me grateful to all of the kind people who helped us out. Thinking of you. Hugs.

 

[MissMacD]

I am in shock because it is my community that is there for me, not the government. The government is doing everything they can to refuse to give me welfare even though my doctor wrote a medical leave for me. It is the middle of the winter here. The government has no problem taxing me on everything I make but when I need some help for a few months they are no where to be found.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

My plans changed today. I already did my chores and I took out the trash. We did not do our taxes today. We are still waiting on some paperwork.

I am doing the wash. It is not very much so it will not take long to do.

I bought me some dark beer today. My husband is not happy. I thought I would drink it after he goes to bed so it does not affect him. I want to go back to smoking too but I need the money for other things.

My husband is not a happy camper. His feelings are hurt. I am amazed. He can hurt my feelings and he does not apologize and if I make an independent choice it devastates him. He is all shut down. He is so afraid that things will get bad. He was talking divorce, but I said there would be no one to take care of him and he would be placed in a state home. His response, someone would have to pay for that.

I am glad I bought the beer. I have not drank in years. I think an occassional beer would not hurt anything. I was going to buy wine, but I so love the dark beer. So I am on edge. I will drink after he goes to bed.

 

[ms spock]

My goal for the day is to really think things out in a totally non PTSD thinking way.

 

[MissMacD]

Made it to the community kitchen at the food bank in my neighborhood. It was really nice to share my culinary knowledge and help a meal come together. It was the first feel good that I've had in a really long time.

 

[GreenFrog2]

I am going to let my emotions flow - I will cry and grieve and allow myself to be sad. MY brother is getting married today - I won't be there to participate in the joy and festivities.

I am so sad. Full of remorse and guilt and anger and rage. For today I will let these things happen. If I go backward so be it - I need to feel. I care so much about them, but could never show it. I care so much about myself and could never show it.

Just for today - I will let it all out.

 

[ms spock]

My goal today is to do some exercise.

 

[ms spock]

I did it! I had a splash in the pool!

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I already did my morning chores, and got dressed and ready to go. Waiting for my husband to get out of the shower so I can help him put his shirt on. I am going to run some errands and get us frappes I am hopeful that this will be a good day.