I am So Fedup With Treatment

[ptsd_cracker]

Rob,

I absolutely did not direct that comment at you :doh:. It was directed at Anthony for his previous comments. As far as your comment, it was positive and helpful and was very much appreciated.

Thank you,
Alison

 

[rob_4760]

I sorry for misunderstanding I not should read these just after taking my meds. I didn't see the other name so sorry again.

 

[anthony]

Alison, your still avoiding the questions I asked. I answered your questions, yet you seem to not be capable of answering mine. Why is that? Maybe you don't want to be truthful with yourself? You cannot fix something you do not 100% acknowledge, and that is a fact. You must remove all and any denial. You seem to think you must be the first person that has been in this situation with me, yet anyone who I help ends up in the same place, between a rock and a hard place until you can be 100% honest with yourself and myself. Sympathy does not allow that level of honesty I am afraid.

 

[grace5555]

Alison,

I have been reading this site for quite a while - finding some sthing helpful and others not with my personal struggle with PTSD. I have not joined or posted out of safety issues for myself, but I needed to jump in here and say I agree with you regarding the harsh statements from Anthony and do not think you are off base at all. This is said from an unbiased outsider who is in therapy with a very gentle, sympathetic and HONEST therapist who tells me the truth with compassion. I am not sure what you might have triggered with Anthony, but it sounds like he might be experiencing some classic transference with you for whatever reason. I would have been extremely hurt as well to have gotten the responses you have received in the condemning language they were given. Even at our lowest points, none of us need or deserve condemnation in my own opinion.

 

[ptsd_cracker]

Thank you for your support and I believe that more people will agree after reading all these posts.

As for Anthony, again feel free to post what you want, it makes you feel big, why not. I understand that some people must always be right or it would crush their egos. It's obvious that you need the attention and I am not taking this personal.

I never asked you for your help or advice Anthony.

 

[grace5555]

Alison,

I accidentally sent my last post before quite finishing and signing off. I just wanted to end it with a hope that everyone gets the help and support they need, including Anthony. I have never been through his experiences so cannot say how I would react to his very intense and significant pain. It sounds like you are in a very painful place as well. My prayer is for healing and peace for all of us in this valley called PTSD.

Grace

 

[anthony]

Hi Grace, welcome to the forum. Harsh has a purpose here, and again, this forum is not for everyone, never was designed to be. This forum is to remove the sympathy nonsense that people want and get to the guts of the issue, trauma. If anyone wants sympathy, they are in the wrong place. Sympathy does not heal trauma. A sufferer out of denial and into actioning heals trauma. Depending on what any one person presents before me depends upon how I handle and respond. Grace, this is not about your trauma, so is not relevant to how I would handle you personally.

This is a kick in the arse to Alison, because she is sitting upon her pity box wanting sympathy, none of which does her any good. It doesn't affect me, it does her. I have fixed me, and constantly work upon myself. Transference is far from what is going on here. Actually, not even close.

To get a sufferer to truely look inwards, one must first be ready to action themselves. Alison is not. Prove me wrong is what I am asking. Again, your still just attempting to be smug and pityful, instead of simply answering the questions I put too you Alison. I am calling you out, I dare you to answer them, I want you to answer them not for my benefit, but for your own. Get off your high horse Alison with your compassions and sympathy, answer the questions please so you can help yourself.

If you don't want help, don't be here, simple as that. Sympathy sucks the good from others here who want to heal. Those coming here wanting sympathy as you admitted too, makes others worse because they give something they should not, something they don't have to give another because they struggle to cope with their own daily internal battles.

So... get off your high horse please and simply answer the questions, instead of being rude and almighty. Sounds to me like your struggling for power, not I. Sounds to me that you want power, which is typical for someone drawing sympathy, wanting sympathy, they want to drag everyone else to their level, just like depression usually does.

Do yourself a favour and just please answer the questions... what can it hurt you? None maybe?

 

[Sapper]

But when it comes right down to it there are considerable differences in our traumas. You were aware that you were going to have to kill and see people killed, its apart of your job duties. On the other hand I have never show any violence or committed any unspeakable act. It wasnt my duty and /or I wasnt the attacker, abuser, or killer, I was the child, the daughter, the g/f, , patient, victim and/or survivor.

So cracker your saying because Anthony was military, he deserves to have PTSD more than you do? He brought it on himself because of the profession he chose? Do you feel the same way about say, a prostitute or a stripper? Lets be honest, if some poor woman working as a stripper was raped and got PTSD, lots would say she brought it on herself. Not me, let me make that clear, but lots would. What your saying is the same shit, different pile IMO. Is there a scale of worthiness from 1-10 when it comes to trauma? Someone abused as a child would be #1, and a soldier maybe #5 or lower? Where on the scale would you place prisoners? Police officers? Firefighters? Battered wives? Something to think about maybe?

 

[becvan]

Yeah, Anthony is right. The whole poor me does not work. We have to get serious and we can't do it while patting each other on the back.

I've had my fights with Anthony (well, really me yelling at him, he does stay calm!) while he's trying to kick me out of my pity pot or my depression, because I can't heal while I'm in that state. And I've come a long way since then!

Why aren't you answering the questions Cracker? They are good questions and I know what Anthony is asking for. If you sit down and really start trying to answer them, you'll be surprised at the answers. It will also help you see what you need to really be working on.

I also agree with Sapper, that it HAD sounded like you felt how one got PTSD mattered. It doesn't. PTSD is PTSD, and we all have to heal from it.

I would love to hear the answers to the questions that Anthony put forth.

bec

 

[ptsd_cracker]

So cracker your saying because Anthony was military, he deserves to have PTSD more than you do? He brought it on himself because of the profession he chose? Do you feel the same way about say, a prostitute or a stripper? Lets be honest, if some poor woman working as a stripper was raped and got PTSD, lots would say she brought it on herself. Not me, let me make that clear, but lots would. What your saying is the same shit, different pile IMO. Is there a scale of worthiness from 1-10 when it comes to trauma? Someone abused as a child would be #1, and a soldier maybe #5 or lower? Where on the scale would you place prisoners? Police officers? Firefighters? Battered wives? Something to think about maybe?

What I am saying is that the military, the firefighters, police, etc. are all well aware of the risks that they assume going into the job. The have had the education and the training to manage the reactions they assume with the job. A victim of violence has no prior knowledge of the risks, they do not assume the risk. When I acted to save another person from a brutal assault, I assumed the risk.

I don't think anyone deserves to get PTSD more than anyone else regardless of if they are military, a battered wife or a child abuse victim. There is also a very large spectrum for PTSD so people experience it for a few months, some people many years and some people will never be able to manage their symptoms to lead a normal life.

Also when trying to heal a PTSD sufferer goes through many stages, whether it be denial, grief, depression, anger, sadness or the need for sympathy, etc. We should not criticize others for the stage of healing they are in or how long it lasts as long as it doesn't personally affect us.

I am also glad that Anthony feels so passionate about making sure I am not in denial and to deal with the causes and not the symptoms. If you are trying to help me Anthony thank you. But I don't see how bullying or demanding me into seeing that I am just seeking sympathy or in denial is going to help me.

The cause of my PTSD is abuse.....abuse by men mostly and people I have trusted. The environment that I grew up in abuse became normal to me.

As far as Anthony's first questions I did try to answer them but obviously he meant one thing and I understood the other. I wasn't trying to avoid the question, I just answer them the best I could. But Anthony responded in away that attacked and criticized me. He then has continued to belittle me and demand me to act and think in a certain way. Is that not abuse in itself? Then I asked him politely to stop and he refused. Isn't that more abusive behaviour? Anthony still continues to force his opinions on me and that is abusive. I have not and will not address his any of his future questions.

 

[ptsd_cracker]

Yeah, Anthony is right. The whole poor me does not work. We have to get serious and we can't do it while patting each other on the back.

I've had my fights with Anthony (well, really me yelling at him, he does stay calm!) while he's trying to kick me out of my pity pot or my depression, because I can't heal while I'm in that state. And I've come a long way since then!

Why aren't you answering the questions Cracker? They are good questions and I know what Anthony is asking for. If you sit down and really start trying to answer them, you'll be surprised at the answers. It will also help you see what you need to really be working on.

I also agree with Sapper, that it HAD sounded like you felt how one got PTSD mattered. It doesn't. PTSD is PTSD, and we all have to heal from it.

I would love to hear the answers to the questions that Anthony put forth.

bec

In my original post I was basically stating that I was frustrated with the process, running out of money, my symptoms were out of control and I didn't know what to do anymore.

Where did I ask for sympathy? I was however looking for advice on what I should do next, thinking that someone might relate to my situation where they could tell me that they pursued blank and it worked or didn't work for this reason.

Selling my house is a big life decision and I was trying to gather enough information to make an informed choice.

 

[Jim]

What I am saying is that the military, the firefighters, police, etc. are all well aware of the risks that they assume going into the job. The have had the education and the training to manage the reactions they assume with the job.

Must disagree with you Cracker. The military does not prepare its personnel for the possibility of trauma and mental illness. Far from it actually. However. Would be a good idea if they did.

Jim.