Making Major Decisions..

[who am i kim]

I am aware that you should not make decisions when not well. I had to make one today. It was for my own sanity that I did this and to help my marriage as it involved both of us. I basically had to let him win and take over and let him now be the boss of what was my mowing business. He has been helping me out since he became unemployed 2 years ago. He and I have different styles of work. Basically it got to a breaking point for me and I had to do something. It would have just exploded into a major argument that I would have never handled or won. So it is better I did it this way. He did not say much when I gave it all to him, he was quite and just asked if I could still do the books, which is okay by me.

This is me letting off a bit of steam here, I have been also so sad over this too, but it had to go and be. It is like the story of my life. I cannot express myself, my needs and wants. It is too hard to do for me. There is another whole story here so I will not say anymore.

Sometimes decisions just have to been done, even when you are not well. Do you agree or not agree here? Not looking for any feedback, as I had to do it. Just my thoughts.


W

 

[The Albatross]

I chose to opt out of my husbands small business (when he had one) too because of arguments and disagreements. I know it isn't an easy decision to make. I understand too about feeling sad about it.

 

[Eleanor]

In my marriage we take the position that it is a dance, sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow. If you are not well, he ought to step up and take the lead. When/if he is not well, it will be your turn.

My two cents: let him be the hero for a while. Take care of yourself. Heal. Learn to ask for what you want and need. Unless he is an A***ole he knows how you feel about this and will be open to you coming back in when you are ready. If he IS an A****le then that is a different problem.

 

[cat]

Well done Kim. :) I can imagine that was a tough decision for you . Take the time to concentrate on yourself & therapy, you deserve that, then, when you are well you can take a full role in your business again.

I cannot express myself, my needs and wants. It is too hard to do for me.

It's tough feeling like this Kim, give yourself some time, through therapy you will heal & understand yourself better.

Thinking of you, chat soon.

 

[Rumors]

What Eleanor said!! Best wishes. Hope you feel up to par soon!

 

[quaintpapercut]

I basically had to let him win and take over and let him now be the boss of what was my mowing business.

Do you think he has your best intentions at heart? I know its hard to let go of things when your used to doing things your own way and being independent, but sometimes the smartest thing we can do is step away for a little while.

 

[I Can Do This]

If he has been unemployed for 2 years - then he is going through a traumatic experience too. I think you did the right thing because it was the best you could do for both of you in that moment. Stopping the fight is un-selfish, mature and considerate! If you think about what men go through when they are not working, his reactions could be showing how deeply affected he is by being out of work.