Is Life With Ptsd Worth Living?

[InHell11]

I recently finally had the PTSD diagnosed. I'll have to talk to the psychiatrist about the trazodone, and its possible I might be able to work something out for the prescriptions at the mental health clinic I go since I don't have income.

I also decided I'd give the effexor the psychiatrist prescribed a try as well I still have a months supply I was afraid to take because at the time I wasn't feeling this bad and was afraid it would make me feel worse like past anti-depressants . Took one today and I'll go from there since that is the conclusion me and the therapist came to and if I have any problems between now and next appointment I can either call her or the crisis line they have for the mental health clinic.

 

[DharmaGirl]

If you do decide to go inpatient, it helps with getting SSI. For SSDI, you had to be unstable, and since I was in and out of the hospital every 2 months I got it right away. The social worker there can help you set up the things you need. I'm sorry you are feeling so bad, I have been where you are and it is a miserable place to be. Good luck to you and keep posting.

 

[Leah123]

Hi. I'm sorry you're suffering so. I've had some dark nights too, too many, I think we all have, to be here. But... I just wanted to tell you, you sound brave. Look at everything you're feeling, but you're still fighting!!!! I'm happy you're fighting. I hope you don't mind my saying that- I know it's REALLY hard.

 

[shoulderblades]

I am not so sure. I mean I am burnt out and sick of it, yet I'm stuck with it. It brings pain and misery, sometimes I am able to alleviate that for a little while, or distract myself enough to where I don't notice too much. Then the symptoms still continue, I might have a good day and wake up the next morning wishing I hadn't.

I am never sure of myself and feel way more guilt than I should about everything so I wonder if I even have PTSD or if I just failed at life to begin with or both.

It's like you've quoted my thoughts and feelings exactly. Everything you've said is what I struggle with almost every day. I feel so trapped in my sadness and my past and my triggers that I can't work out my C-PTSD from me just being a failure of a human being; I don't know where the line is drawn between the two, or if there even is a line.

 

[Leah123]

I can't work out my C-PTSD from me just being a failure of a human being; I don't know where the line is drawn between the two, or if there even is a line.

I think that too, some days, less now than in the past, and I see, more clearly all the time, that I'm doing the math wrong when I add up symptoms and issues and come to that conclusion. I'm prone to forget that for me, the voice telling me I should be the guilty one and that I have "failed" is the voice of my mother and the church I was raised in. Damaging mother + Damaging Church + abusive, unstable family = One hell of a guilt complex and less than ideal coping mechanisms.

I wonder if there's any variables you might not be considering when you're feeling so low. When I feel really really overwhelmed, it's hard for me to remember even the most clear-cut reasons I might be that way, I even forget about the day to day things that might be really upsetting and adding to my sinking spells as my therapist calls them.