Trigger Warnings And Trigger "words"

[bitterfight_]

I use trigger warnings on my blog, just to be safe, but honestly, it actually helps me a lot to read stories similar to mine (even if it makes me feel extremely extremely uncomfortable). There was only one instance where I was extremely triggered by a tag someone used, and the only reason for that was because they directly quoted (without knowing it) something someone said to me when I was being assaulted. It triggered a number of really horrible flashbacks, but that has been the only time something like that happened. It irritates me too though, when I see things with trigger warnings that aren't necessarily triggers. By this, I mean they make people uncomfortable, but they don't necessarily "trigger" them (ie: spiders, food, plates?). There seems to be a huge misuse of the word "trigger" lately, and it's irritating that this misuse has become almost a fad. It's like, no, it makes you uncomfortable, not triggered. I don't know... Ugh. I can understand photos, or videos, because those are almost a given trigger (depending on the content), but text or otherwise? I guess it's just a tricky topic.

 

[Spiderallis]

While it's good that the general population is becoming more aware of things like PTSD and self injury, the romanticized view of it is almost as bad as ignorance. There's always been malingers, but the mental illness Munchhausen outbreak is troubling. I tend avoid anything with a 'trigger warning' not for the trigger but because of the type of person that usually posts such things. I've not seen much healing or recovery going on where trigger warnings are present. At this point I just associate 'trigger warning' with a victim-as-a-lifestyle mentality. Anyone can be a victim, maybe not all of them can become survivors?

I posted a warning on a discussion forum once, and immediately after wrote out an essay on why I'll never do that again. Some of the people using that word don't seem to understand what it means. Maybe I'm just a meanie. If someone can identify a trigger I sort of expect them to be working on coping skills to deal with it.

 

[bitterfight_]

@Spiderallis

There's always been malingers, but the mental illness Munchhausen outbreak is troubling. I tend avoid anything with a 'trigger warning' not for the trigger but because of the type of person that usually posts such things.

I try not to generalize it, as I use trigger warnings, and not all of us have Munchhausen. If you don't like to associate with people who use trigger warnings, that's fine, but we're not all trying to avoid recovering. For example, I started out my blog without trigger warnings, but because of this fad going on with them, I received a few messages from people requesting it. I agree with you in the fact that if someone can identify a trigger, they should be working on it (and I see it like this, for me anyways): life doesn't coddle us. To me, the internet is the same way. It's life, and life isn't going to protect you from that kind of stuff. You have to be willing to learn about your triggers, and fight like hell to get better. If it does have anything to do with Munchhausen, like you said, I think it's more of the fact that Munchhausen goes unnoticed, as a lot of these people actually don't want to seek help. People with this syndrome seem to seek attention because they crave it. They get involved with the "trigger warning" fad, and try to promote this glamorization of victimology and how damaged they are. Nonetheless, it's sad to see this throughout society.

At the same time, I think saying

At this point I just associate 'trigger warning' with a victim-as-a-lifestyle mentality. Anyone can be a victim, maybe not all of them can become survivors?

is trying to put a clear line between "victim" versus "survivor". All of us are survivors of some type of trauma, but are we not also victims? The dictionary definition of a victim is "a person harmed, injured, or killed as a result of a crime, accident, or other event or action", which I think is a fair thing to say most trauma victims/survivors have went through. It also defines a survivor as "a person who survives, esp. a person remaining alive after an event in which others have died", "the remainder of a group of people or things", and "a person who copes well with difficulties in their life". I think this is true of most of us with trauma too. I don't really think there is a clear line here, and some might see themselves leaning more to one side than another, but I think a lot of the people you're talking about are trying to glamorize this idea of being victimized, and try to promote relapse (and/or prevent their own recovery). Not all of them are, of course, but some of them are generally concerned about the well-being of others if they are so easily triggered online.

Interesting stuff to talk about though. I see your points for sure! And you're not a "meanie" :) you make very good points.

 

[catjudo]

when I see things with trigger warnings that aren't necessarily triggers.

I think this may be my biggest issue with trigger warnings. Because who is to say what a trigger is or is not? When you start using trigger labels there is always going to be someone who comes along and is upset because there wasn't a trigger label on something THEY found triggering. What is triggering to one isn't necessarily triggering to others. Before you know it, everything is labeled with a trigger warning and there is absolutely no value left in using the trigger warning. Therefore, just leave it off entirely and each person be responsible for what they choose to read. I'm glad they are not used or encouraged on this forum but have noticed more and more of them showing up lately.

 

[bitterfight_]

I think this may be my biggest issue with trigger warnings. Because who is to say what a trigger is or is not? When you start using trigger labels there is always going to be someone who comes along and is upset because there wasn't a trigger label on something THEY found triggering.

THIS is literally EXACTLY what I am talking about. I can understand general triggers across a group of survivors/victims, but I had posted on my blog a picture of me when I was thinner, and I got an anonymous message requesting that I tag "pro-anorexia" posts because they're triggering to them. Please note - this was a picture of ME, not a "pro" anything picture. It surprised me a lot, because I think a lot of these teeny boppers don't have a true understanding of what a trigger actually is. I think a lot of them think it means it makes them uncomfortable or makes them feel bad, but I don't think they actually truly understand what a trigger is. It's SO frustrating. I have a general "NSFW" and "trigger warning" in my description, but I don't tag anything anymore. Basically, if they're following me, they should know that they might run into triggers (they should know this ANYWAYS because again, life doesn't coddle people).

 

[Lucycat]

.

I have a general "NSFW" and "trigger warning" in my description

,
Please, what is NSFW?

 

[catjudo]

And if you're so ashamed, as you say you are, why are you putting on the internet for everyone to see? I clearly don't understand.

I don't understand this either. I have had problems with self-harm off and on throughout the years. I've always been careful to only injure in a place that cannot be seen by others. Even when I was married, I changed the way that I self-harmed to make it less noticeable to my husband and I wouldn't let him see me unclothed until it had healed. The only person that really knows I have this issue is my psychiatrist...I've had the same one for over a decade and when things in my life get crazy enough that my self-harm struggle returns I let him know mostly as a way to help him better gauge where I'm at mentally/emotionally and how much or how quickly I need help.

When I see people talking about or showing off their cuts,etc I just cannot wrap my brain around it. I suppose there must be a reason for this type of behavior but it is so far removed from my own reality that I can't begin to understand it. Unfortunately, it definitely makes me take that person less seriously and I'm sure that is an unfair assumption for some of those people.

 

[bitterfight_]

@Lucycat NSFW stands for Not Safe For Work. Not a trigger warning/label, just that I reblog/post some pictures that may contain nudity or similar things (but people shouldn't be on their phones/social media sites at work anyways).

I've always been careful to only injure in a place that cannot be seen by others. Even when I was married, I changed the way that I self-harmed to make it less noticeable to my husband and I wouldn't let him see me unclothed until it had healed. The only person that really knows I have this issue is my psychiatrist

I am the same way. I wouldn't let anyone see it, and mine went unnoticed until I severely hurt myself and had to get stitches for it. It doesn't make sense to me either why people would want to flaunt this behavior, because for me, when I do that, I feel ashamed in myself. It's like that whole "cut for Bieber" thing that went on awhile back. It just blows my mind why anyone would want to show it off to others.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Self-harm in particular is something I try to be careful about throwing judgment around. I've had a long struggle with self-harm and am extremely self-conscious and secretive about it - and then there are people who, seemingly shamelessly, post pictures all over the internet and can't stop talking about it. I have a friend who did it for shock value because she was being neglected by everyone around her and it was her way of screaming "help me". Is that a cry for attention? Yes, but obviously an important one that needs listening to.

LIKE x5,693. Seriously.

I was a cutter in high school back in the 90's before it became a "thing". Yanno, back before emo was cool. Or rather, before emo was known as emo.

So many people judged me harshly because they said I did it just for attention. Well dammit, I DID want attention, and yes, sometimes I did cut just for the attention. But my mind was so out of control---I still didn't realize that being raped as a kid was still affecting me, rather I literally thought I was going crazy---and I wasn't stupid. I knew nobody could see the pain inside but I thought if I could make them see it then maybe they would understand how out of control things really were.

So, if anything, maybe those of us who cut for the attention had a smidgen more forethought in that we thought the attention would get us help that we so desperately needed. I want to smack the self-righteous cutters who act superior because they cut just for the pain relief, and think their reason for cutting is "better".