How To De-compose

[Sandstone]

Finding that therapist is the tricky bit. We're out on a geographical limb here, in a small town facing the sea, with three fairly small cities each over an hour by public transport. Practically speaking my best bet might be 20m mins walk to bus, 40 mins on bus to railway station, 45mins to Cambridge station. Anyone know any decent trauma therapists in Cambridge, reasonably close to the station?

The only trouble being that last week by the time I'd got to our local town I couldn't cross the road safely, but that will improve over time, surely? Otherwise I need to find support just to get that far.

I've been telling anyone who will listen that I want treatment as described by the Royal College of Psychiatrists as below, with an emphasis on the Stabilisation phase. What I really think I need is an inpatient programme, but clearly the people who would pay think there is nothing much wrong with me, and just want me to go away.

"Lack of trust in other people – and the world in general – is central to complex PTSD. Treatment often needs to be longer to allow you to develop a secure relationship with a therapist – to experience that it is possible to trust someone in this world without being hurt or abused. The work will often happen in 3 stages
Stabilisation
You:

• learn how to understand and control your distress and emotional cutting-off, or 'dissociation'. This can involve 'grounding' techniques to help you to stay in the present – concentrating on ordinary physical feelings to remind you that you are living in the present, not the abusive and traumatic past.
• start to 'disconnect' your physical symptoms of fear and anxiety from the memories and emotions that produce them, making them less frightening.
• start to be able to tolerate day-to-day life without experiencing anxiety or flashbacks.

This may sometimes be the only help that is needed.

• Trauma-focussed Therapy

EMDR or Cognitive Behavioural Therapycan help you to remember your traumatic experiences with less distress and more control. Other psychotherapies, including psychodynamic psychotherapy, can also be helpful. Care needs to be taken in complex PTSD because these treatments can make the situation worse if not used properly.

• Reintegration

You begin to develop a new life for yourself. You become able to use your skills or learn new ones, and to make satisfying relationships in the real world.

Medication can be used if you feel too distressed or unsafe, or if psychotherapy is not possible. It can include both antidepressants and antipsychotic medication – but not usually tranquillisers or sleeping tablets."

 

[digger]

Finding that therapist is the tricky bit. We're out on a geographical limb here, in a small town facing the sea, with three fairly small cities each over an hour by public transport. Practically speaking my best bet might be 20m mins walk to bus, 40 mins on bus to railway station, 45mins to Cambridge station. /
The only trouble being that last week by the time I'd got to our local town I couldn't cross the road safely, but that will improve over time, surely? Otherwise I need to find support just to get that far.

Oh I completely sympathise with you on this. I live in a small village surrounded by moorland and more small villages! Very pretty but not exactly overflowing with therapy options. Nearest city therapists are at least two or three buses/trains away and the idea of needing to manage public transport or being somewhere busy immediately after therapy would be a nightmare for me. I honestly don't think I'd be safe to get home alone.

I'm very lucky that I managed to find a therapist half an hour's walk away, but it's meant I've had to compromise. She is a good fit for me in a lot of ways, but she's not specifically a trauma therapist.

 

[Echo]

My therapist pointed out to me that my struggle with the NHS was akin to a trauma reenactment with my parents. Over a year after I first went to my GP, I still haven't been offered anything by them. They tell me I am too fragile to work with the therapy they offer. After months of waiting, I realised this was going nowhere fast, and I found a trauma psychotherapist who specialises in sensorimotor psychotherapy and EMDR. I have no idea if I'll ever get to the EMDR part, but the focus now is on stabilisation, grounding techniques, etc. I much prefer this body work to talk therapy, which I find highly triggering.

The current state of play with my local NHS provider is that they have been taking 4 months so far to decide if they will fund this therapy. I have no high hopes at all, and now see it as a bonus that will probably never happen. I am disgusted by how I've been treated by them, and in general about the dreadful provision for people like me/us. I know some counties are better than others and some people find CBT suits them, and that is great, but being dismissed and messed around, having letters go missing, and having to repeat the stories of my traumas again and again, and chase people to the point of exhaustion and desperation is not my idea of the NHS fulfilling the NICE guidelines.

 

[Hashi]

Telephone counselling? Online? Skype?

Both my previous trauma therapists offered some kind of distance psychotherapy.

I've been telling anyone who will listen that I want treatment as described by the Royal College of Psychiatrists as below, with an emphasis on the Stabilisation phase.

The NHS don't follow best practice, they follow budgets, staff shortages and poor management .

But I think this is an excellent thing to email to a potential private therapist to explain what you want.

 

[Definitely..maybe]

I totally understand this. I don't have any helpful advice but want to reinforce you are not alone! I wish I could act how I'm feeling because I know before my doctors talk to me for awhile they would think I'm perfectly happy.

Sometimes it makes me sad, I wish I was easier to read. Except for my best friend everyone thinks I am such a happy person with no life struggles. In a store the other day I was told 'I'm jealous, I wish I had your life.' It was in a nasty way, and I just wanted to ask this person if they really would want to suffer abuse, rape, etc.

Sorry I made that too much about me BUT I understand :hug: