Job Interview At 3pm Today!

[CraftyCath]

@rainy_daze and @Britt.f7 Thanks friends for your support and encouragement. I am starting to feel better although sleep is elusive. This might have knocked me down but I won't stay down for long.

Hugs to you both :hug:

P.S. the chestnuts were lovely!

 

[Deleted member 6617]

This might have knocked me down but I won't stay down for long.

Good attitude!!! :hug:

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Thank you for leading by example. If enough people would leave they would go out of business. Sending healing hugs and I am so proud of your appropriate anger. Good for you.

 

[CraftyCath]

@Pottershand and @gizmo

Thanks for the support I really need and appreciate it at the moment.

I am so proud of your appropriate anger.

I always get confused when I've been so badly triggered, is the anger justified or not? But as I process what happened I know it is. Thanks for reinforcing that Gizmo. x

I know I am getting better slowly but I am so impatient and just want to be better now!:rolleyes: At the moment I need ME time but I surrounded by people who want my attention. I have a hotel voucher that might get me one night alone in a hotel.

I have been having such troubled sleep and nightmares. I dream of my past traumas and then I dream about the shop and being followed around it. I get scared, hypervigilant and deeply upset. I know it will settle down but I hate it.

H and I are taking my sister to Liverpool to see her off on her cruise. She has booked me and H into a posh hotel overnight and paid for it - very generous. I was looking forward to our time alone but then found out my brother and his wife have booked into the same hotel as us and want to spend time with us. Very nice of them but they don't understand my need to be alone. H and I were planning on taking a bottle of wine with us and having room service - having a romantic time together. I will try to make them see that I am just not well and need some quiet time - I don't think they will understand. They don't have children so they don't feel the need for time away from them as we do. Ah well.

 

[Nighthawk]

Oh I so get it. Just the pressure from my family calling my T to ask when I can return back to my brothers office has me in an absoulte painc. Felling shredded and having memories and trauma responses to the toxic enviroment there. I have tried to figure out what is an appropriate responce other than distress. Im not sure if I am dissapointed that they still dont get it and they never will because they dont want too.

I really hope that this will ease for you soon. I am here just wish these things did not affect us they way they do. I also would hope that we can learn to cope with them better.

In my thoughts

XOXO:hug:

 

[CraftyCath]

@Nighthawk Thanks for understanding NH, it is so good to come to the Forum and find others that truly understand and are supportive. I wish I knew the answers - how do we respond to it all other than distress? It's exhausting. If anyone knows the answer I'm all ears.

If I try to talk about stuff with my family they just switch off on me and quickly change the subject. A few possible reasons are: they don't care (I know mine do); they want me to be happy and are hurt when I am not (this is true of mine); they do not understand (they could educate themselves but they don't); they don't want to know (if they did they would feel morally responsible to help); they are frightened (it is out of their comfort zone and something they cannot control); they are shamed (due to their own ignorance); it upsets their image of how their life should be, it bursts their bubble. So many reasons. I have no family support although they all know about it.

I'm so grateful for all the help and support I have had from you guys - you're all amazing!

I'm making progress but am still hypervigilant and jumpy. I am paranoid that the boss or one of the other staff will call at the house even though I know that is silly!

I am nervous about going away for the weekend because we have no money and it is now something we can't get out of.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

My heart sure goes out to Cath. I am so sorry that you are stuck in this impossible situation.

When I first got married, my husband was layed off and I had to go to places called Food Banks to get food.

I hope for better things for you from now on. Big Hugs.

 

[CraftyCath]

@gizmo Thank you for your kind words :hug:

I'm going away tomorrow with the family - I just hope I don't freak out! :eek:

 

[Britt.f7]

Have a good time. Try to relax. I know, easier said then done.

 

[Deleted member 6617]

Have a fabulous trip and try to enjoy the moments one at a time. Sometimes that is the best way to handle things...just a moment at a time!

 

[CraftyCath]

I had a fab time! Telling my family exactly what I wanted and needed to do before we went paid off and I had the most wonderful time. Room service and a special cake from the hotel for my birthday. I ate loads (I usually panic) and I was really relaxed and had genuine fun.

I am proud of myself and grateful to my family for treating me so well and allowing me the space I needed to recover from the job thing. I am now on my way to healing and have a head full of plans for my art.

Thank you folks for being here for me. :hug:

 

[Britt.f7]

Happy birthday! I hope it was exciting. What a nice thing for that hotel to do! I'm glad you enjoyed yourself! You are worth happiness.