Do You Censor What You Tell Your T?

[pickledpepper]

I don't mean keeping back important information, but the amount of detail you go into when you are talking about it.
I sometimes wonder if I am I trying to shelter my T in some way. It doesn't feel right to make someone listen to details like that. Even though I know that's her job and she's probably heard much worse before from other clients.

 

[Igem]

Yes, sometimes I do. Usually because the topic is shameful, embarrassing, or evokes an emotion I can't deal with if I talk further. As well, I can't help but feel like I can't fully trust people. All I can say is it is something I work on regularly and try not to do.

 

[Hemufe]

I have in the past due to shame but i have started to become more open in recent months because i now know what i went through is not my fault

 

[Ohol]

Yes, and I no doubt keep back "important" information as well. For all the reasons already mentioned. And, he's not stupid, he's probably aware of it or suspects it. It's a process and sometimes a slow one, to trust people.

 

[Wogi]

Details, no one of them got to hear, because they're simply too personal. Censoring even general concepts, yeah, I did quite a lot of it. I usually stated some of problematic areas straight ahead though, seeing if they'd be willing to take me in therapy at all or not.

 

[One]

I did a lot with my first T. After I'd finished with her I realised a lot of the stuff I'd left out was stuff I still needed to process. I try not to do it with my current T but sonetimes it's really hard, especially if it's something I find shameful.

 

[Apidu]

I don't censor what I say to my T, but I often leave out a lot of the detail, unless it matters to me. Sometimes, he asks me for more detail, in which case I do my best to provide what I've been asked for.

I think that early on, I was a lot more careful with what I said to him. These days, I trust him to handle most things pretty smoothly.

I have parts that don't want to be seen by him, and I avoid forcing them. But they've eventually manifested in his presence, one way or another.

 

[Wuvinuv]

Yes, like the others, due to trust, gear and vulnerability. Sometimes I even write things down to take in and won't talk about it, leaving it in my car.

I'm happy to say it's getting better, but it's taking a really long time. My walls are higher with my therapist than anyone else simply because of the purpose of the relationship.

I think the most productive sessions are those where I push the words out, making just a little bit more effort to share. The world never crashes down and she never over reacts. In fact, sometimes I wish for a bigger reaction.

Have you ever tried thinking ahead of your session about how you can share just a little bit more? I believe that part of our growth means getting out of the comfort zone. And when I use comfort and therapy together, that alone is a stretch. ;-)

Best to you.

 

[Noga]

The only thing I hold back on purpose are suicide/homicide things. No need to put a mandated reporter in an awkward position.

 

[Ucifo]

No need to put a mandated reporter in an awkward position.

There's a REASON some people are mandated reporters.

 

[pickledpepper]

Thanks for the replies.

Shame and embarrassment do play a part, but it's the sense that I might be protecting her from hearing the worst of it that I think I need to work on at the moment. Does anyone else feel like they might keep details from their T for this reason?

I should add that this hasn't come from her or her past reactions to anything and mandatory reporting isn't a concern for me.

 

[Jumat]

Does anyone else feel like they might keep details from their T for this reason?

Yes. We've talked about it. He says he can take care of himself.