Tolerating Good Feelings (or Just Feeling "okay")

[Chava]

I like simple things like chimes or bells for pulling me out of my fog.

 

[KwanYingirl]

I have Tibetan singing bowls in my iTunes and play it as I go to sleep. Quiets my racing thoughts of which I have almost constantly. Will not stop even at yin yoga unless I actively say to my mind "I am breathing in" or " I am breathing out".

I got so excited by the singing bowls, I went for a session of crystal bowl sound therapy. I got such a migraine from the enormous vibrations it made me puke. It was initially exciting to feel the vibrations, maybe I could stand a shorter time but would rather not experiment. The singing bowls do the trick. I know in general that I have to attend to my sense of sound. It's wrapped up in my trauma experience so much that I crave total silence. Then the racing thoughts flood my brain and I'm back to square one. Ack!

 

[jgregor]

I'm relatively new to this website, but I can truly relate to some of the comments. Thank you for your honesty. I am working toward the self-care piece myself and I often fall asleep to soothing music to cut down on the mental chatter. The smell of incense also seems to soothe me and to trigger some sort of relaxation response.

 

[Chava]

I went for a session of crystal bowl sound therapy. I got such a migraine from the enormous vibrations it made me puke. It was initially exciting to feel the vibrations, maybe I could stand a shorter time but would rather not experiment. The singing bowls do the trick. I know in general that I have to attend to my sense of sound. It's wrapped up in my trauma experience so much that I crave total silence.

Sound is really powerful and interesting. I'm hyper sensitive, so interesting to hear your comments about crystal bowls. I think I would totally love it but could get too full of it quickly. Those supposedly soothing binaural beats make me get the sick feelings quickly (the slower ones like delta waves...separate topic, but related). But the right frequencies and vibrations are also more grounding than anything. I'm really interested in working more with sound and glad my therapist supports this resource path for me.

In one very early body memory state it felt like sound was the only thing I could access and "do" something with. Being totally immobilized I could work with it internally...and that pulled me out. There was the feeling that this was a very early resource for me. For babies early resources (stuff that helps with inner organization) would be contact, touch, subtle movement like rocking, or sound. Sound was the one that felt safe.

Music has always been the place where it is safe to have good feelings...probably because I could perform for others or also be mentally engaged...it never felt like direct self-soothing or whatever. I could access a big range of feelings safely. Still not sure how to replace the major gig I had to give up but I'm well aware of that deficit.

@jgregor welcome...those sound like some good strategies. Self-care seems to be the major project for many of us.

 

[Intrepid]

I have 2 experiences, numbness and hyperawareness/anxiety. I'm looking for the place where I can tolerate who I am without going to extremes.

 

[Weemie]

i def get it. my brain only works when there's crisis around tbh.

 

[ms spock]

It takes a lot of practice I think, well for me anyway, to learn to be grounded enough to take the charge in of feeling good. It is very challenging.

 

[Chava]

My feet were very tight last night so I soaked them in warm water. It's helpful to recognize I'm able to respond in some ways like this...like some soothing things are okay. Feeling "good" or happy (and certainly thinking I can sustain those feelings) seems off limits. But it's nice if I can soak my soar feet and feel okay with that.