General Sick And Snuggly

[nursenurse]

The Ex Hubby was THE worst. He had a "sick" bathrobe from his childhood that he used well into his forties. No spooning with me, I tell ya! I went happily to the spare room while he shook the plaster from the ceiling with his heightened "sick" snoring. I would get him set up with anything and everything he needed and then go out with our daughter for a few hours so he could have some peace and quiet. Then I was accused of abandoning him, but he expected a young child to be quiet for the whole day while he was busy being ill. At least now I get paid for my nursing ;)

 

[Sweetpea76]

@Wastinglight you need to try snuggling up to him when you have the monthlies and see if he is as sympathetic ;):laugh:

 

[Sighs]

@somerandomguy and @Peach - I have the opposite problem. My vet simply will NOT acknowledge that he is sick and take it easy. He has regular malarial relapses and I can SEE him shaking and shivering and yet he'll be out with the chain saw cutting timber, or doing the horses hooves or doing a 25km hike on a hunt. I'd almost prefer to deal with manflu!

 

[Peach]

@somerandomguy and @Peach - I have the opposite problem. My vet simply will NOT acknowledge that he is sick and take it easy.

Yes, sometimes they do take the soldier on attitude a bit too far. Your man sounds like he takes it to the extreme. Poor fella. I hope he doesn't do himself a huge disservice by never letting his body rest.

My vet says his ankles, knees, and back are knackered from - well, the usual training and work, but also regularly jumping out of helicopters, which would hover 10 - 15 feet up (and here I get woozy on the third rung of a ladder haha!), with a 50 pound ruck on his back and carrying his 80 pound AES dog in his arms. We went to a scenic tourist spot one day and the walk to the actual attraction was much farther than I thought (about a mile each way). It was up and down some gentle hills, which was okay, but the further we went the worse it got, until we hit a spot with about 100 stairs. I asked him if he wanted to just call it a day, but he said, "No, we're almost there, might as well keep going." Going down was okay, but the poor guy bearly made it back up the stairs. He had to stop several times (which I think he was also embarrassed about because he "used to be fit as f***") and was practically dragging his right leg. I told him I'd give him a piggy back ride, but he didn't go for it. LOL Anyway, that night he hit the Ibuprofen pretty hard, he massaged he knees and ankles a lot, and he was limping for the next several days. I did offer him a full body massage...LMAO!

Despite all that he was so proud of himself for being able to do that much. He kept telling his old Army buddies that it was a "forced march". Lol!

I just feel so sad when people hurt, especially our vets, because most have the same story: He's basically given his life to his Government and all he has to show for it is chronic physical pain, PTSD, and a pension that he can hardly survive on. Makes me sick.

 

[Sighs]

He's basically given his life to his Government and all he has to show for it is chronic physical pain, PTSD, and a pension that he can hardly survive on. Makes me sick.

I have to admit that my guy gets a pretty good pension - he "makes" more than I do, but it doesn't make up for the chronic pain or the PTSD. It makes me mad that they know they put our men in harm's way - hell - that's an infantry soldier's job to be in harm's way! - and then discharge them and say - okay, at ease - go about normal civilian life.

 

[Peach]

I have to admit that my guy gets a pretty good pension - he "makes" more than I do, but it doesn't make up for the chronic pain or the PTSD.

I am glad to hear that he is making a decent amount, one less thing to stress over, which is always a good thing! But you're right, its not enough, given the effects they still suffer every day.

I don't know how the Australian government works, but I'd imagine it is pretty similar to the Brits, in that the pension comes with a ton of rules about where you can live and how long you can be out of the country, etc. before the pension starts facing cuts. I'm not even sure what the rules are for US soldiers. I need to do some research on that.

 

[Sighs]

The larger portion of his income come from his military superannuation fund. He was pretty senior by the time he was medically retired so he gets a decent amount there. I don't believe there are any rules about where he lives etc on that front because its his super. The smaller portion is a Vet Affairs Total and Permanently Disabled pension. I have no idea if that would continue if he were to leave the country. He fought for this country and his mates died for this country. He would never leave it.

 

[Sweetpea76]

I'm not even sure what the rules are for US soldiers. I need to do some research on that.

In a nutshell, it is a hot mess. It is a complicated system, and a lot of guys need an advocate to even begin to file for it. The VA handles the pensions for medically retired or disabled soldiers, not the branch they served in. They also may qualify for social security benefits if they are permanently disabled. There is a rating system to determine "how disabled" a soldier is (using "VA Math" that doesn't really add up to the results that they somehow get), and then there is issues whether or not a soldier is "total and permanent" (meaning they are disabled in such a way that VA will never reassess them) and if they have "individual unemployability" (meaning that they are disabled in such a way that they cannot work). Like my vet is 100% total and permanent IU from service connected injuries.

Then you factor in dependents... oy vey.

 

[holdenmonty]

Back to the OP I noticed that I tend to not be very loving on my wife in the form of hugs or cuddling or any of that stuff, but sometimes usually after reading threads in the supporter part of the forum I realize how much my wife does for me and our family and how much stuff I put her through and it causes me to have very strong loving feelings for her and want to show her how much I appreciate her by telling her and showing her.

So kind of in summary without getting to mushy this combat vet with PTSD wants to thank you supporters for helping me love my wife that much more.

 

[Peach]

Awww, Monty! That is sooooo sweet!:joyful:

 

[Wastinglight]

this combat vet with PTSD wants to thank you supporters for helping me love my wife that much more.

Back at ya buddy! You guys help us understand and provide support in an appropriate and loving way!

Without all the advice and support provided by contributors to this forum, my relationship probably would never gotten off the ground, so thank you from me too!