• We are a multilingual website again. Read the notice about this.
  • Understand AI use at MyPTSD: all AI use is explained in our AI help page. AI use is by choice here. It exists if you want it, but does nothing unless you choose to use it.

Sufferer Ptsd And My Facial Scar Are Slowly Killing Me

  • Post starter Post starter Scarface
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
S

Scarface

Hi everyone.

I was involved in an accident 7 months ago and my life has been a living hell ever since. I got whacked in the head during an unfortunate sporting accident causing a deep and painful gash on my forehead requiring stitches. Now I have an ugly scar in a very visible spot of my face.

My life was pretty much perfect before the accident. I was young, healthy, fit, extremely athletic, successful, self-confident, attractive, with a good family and large network of friends. I always had something fun or interesting lined up on my calendar. All I was missing was a partner in crime, but I was enjoying the single life in an amazing city while looking for that special someone.

However, ever since the accident, I've been completely traumatized. My suffering mostly revolves around the permanent scar on my face. I feel so ugly and demoralized. I have become a hermit, and no longer exercise or socialize. I have sever depression and anxiety over my face. I'm devastated that I have to live with this deforming scar on my face and don't know how I'll ever feel confident and attractive again. I'm a female and have always been very attractive, but I was never a beauty queen or diva. I was just very happy with how my face and skin looked. It was my identity. And it was stolen from me in the blink of an eye.

Family and friends have been incredibly unsupportive. I get "it could have been so much worse", "you're lucky to be alive", "don't you think you're overreacting", "you've got bdd", "you're acting like Michael Jackson", "you're vain and a narcissist", "quit being a depressive weirdo", "why don't you just snap out of it," "you're still beautiful, but I wouldn't want it on my face". the list goes on and on.

The bottom line is the scar is bad to me and it makes me feel like shit. It can't even be concealed with makeup. I don't think anyone gets it unless they suffer from facial scarring. And now that I have a scar all I do is analyze other people's faces for large scars. I don't see hardly any other people with large obvious facial scars.

I feel so alone, like I'm on an island. I think about suicide everyday to end the pain, but I'm too scared to die so I don't think I'll act on it. I've isolated myself from almost everyone and feel myself getting sicker and sicker everyday (both mentally and physically). I am becoming exactly what I feared the most, a crazy agoraphobic cat lady who no longer cares about my appearance and will be single for the rest of my life. I've tried therapy and it doesn't help. Therapy can't bring back my face. The scar is what prohibits me from leaving my house and living a normal life. It has completely consumed me and broken me down. I am like a prisoner in my own body and the scar is the first thing I see every time it look in the mirror.

I have no history of major depression or bdd.
 
Hi everyone.

I was involved in an accident 7 months ago and my life has been a living hell ever since...

Also I keep thinking about how great my life was before the accident and how I took everything for granted. It's almost like my old self (pre accident) is like someone I used to know. Like a best friend who suddenly died. I keep playing the awful day of the accident back in my head over and over again, thinking "what if I didn't go out that day, what if?!" I was so close to staying home that day. So close!

Is this type of thinking common of ptsd?
 
Thinking bangs ( fringe ) to cover your forehead, or at least redirect attention away from the scar?
I'm 42 and my forehead wrinkles up like a boxer dog when I raise my eyebrows...so yeah, bangs! Good things!

I have a large facial scar...that's not all *that* noticeable, simply because it conforms to my eyebrow ridge...and I have age spots.
I also like to slap a large and eccentric hat on my head.
Hats can cover up my goofy-ass home haircuts.

...please to get therapy.
Want you to be happy.
 
Last edited:
I've tried bangs. I hate them and feel restricted. And any time the wind blows the wrong way, I'm traumatized all over again :(
 
I don't see hardly any other people with large obvious facial scars.
And, if you did, how would you react to them?
The scar is what prohibits me from leaving my house and living a normal life.
If that scar inhibited your mobility, that might be true. From your description, what really keeps you from leaving the house and living your life is your reaction to the scar. And you have a choice about that. Ms Spock started a great thread on cognitive distortions awhile back. You might want to check it out. That way of thinking isn't unique to PTSD. Everyone experiences them to one degree or another.
I was just very happy with how my face and skin looked. It was my identity. And it was stolen from me in the blink of an eye.
A lot of old people say the same thing. The thing is, how you look is NOT who you are. Never was.

Welcome to the forum. There are a lot of good and interesting people here. (And then there's the rest of us. :confused:) With all kinds of scars. Some that you can see and some that you can't.
(edited because spell check let me down!)
 
Welcome to the forum. Although I'm sure you've heard it many times, your looks do not define who you are. I hope you can find some comfort here.
 
And, if you did, how would you react to them?

A lot of old people say the same thing. The thing is, how you look is NOT who you are. Never was.

Welcome to the forum. There are a lot of good and interesting people here. (And then there's the rest of us. :confused:) With all kinds of scars. Some that you can see and some that you can't.
(edited because spell check let me down!)

I wish it were that simple. The fact is scarring is disfigurement and this is extremely distressing. Disfigurement is not simply aging.

When I used to see someone with scars or disfigurement, I would feel sorry and initially shy away from them. Or I would always subconsciously associate the scar/disfigurement with them. It's just human nature.
 
I still see my facial scar loud and clear but others don't. It took time though and I read up and used some techniques to get most of the discoloration gone. Facial disfigurement was a bitter pill to swallow... though now I adapted and take it in stride. The other scarring on my body... some disappeared completely, some is barely noticeable now... except the biggest one. I though was not considered particularly beautiful before a German Shepherd attacked me, biting my face.

Have you been diagnosed with PTSD or is this a traumatic event?

Also for what it's worth the 10 distortions are not just PTSD but common to all people though in varying degrees.
 
When I used to see someone with scars or disfigurement, I would feel sorry and initially shy away from them. Or I would always subconsciously associate the scar/disfigurement with them. It's just human nature.

I never have.

I tend to like scars, in general. They show us where we've been. That said? Very few of the people I've dated have been scar free. Not talking nicked yourself shaving, either. Shot, stabbed, burned, branded, lashed, road rashes, cut into, cut on, cut off... Occupational hazard in my field... And while it durn well may be why we started dating in the first place (or at least ended up nekkid in the first place, doing a bit of a a 1 upmanship "Oh yeah? Check this one out!" Much more fun version of Go Fish), within a few weeks or few months? I could never remember they even had them. Like someone might reference them to me that way, or ask me about it because they didn't want to be rude and ask them, and I'd have to stop and think; WTF are they talking about? Think, think, think... Oh! Right! So&So.

I just don't see people that way. Never have.

It's totally normal that if you've always been repulsed by scars, to think everyone else is, too. Judging others by ourselves is our first place to start to reference the world. But people really are very different from each other. While there are undoubtedly people who feel as you have; repulsed and pitying and constantly aware/associating... There are also plenty of people like me out there, who couldn't care less. <chuckling> Unless it helps me get someone absolutely delicious and delightful a bit more unemcumbered by stupid clothes ;) Scars aren't a turn on for me (there are those people, too), they're just a thing. Lol. Sometimes a very useful thing. But mostly, just a completely neutral thing. Like having blue eyes or black hair.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.

Donation drives

2026 Donation Goal

Goal
$1,800.00
Earned
$910.00
This donation drive ends in
0 hours, 0 minutes, 0 seconds
  50.6%

Trending content

Featured content

Back
Top Bottom