This F#%*ing Hell Hole

[Smile]

@Justmehere , your post was so very very kind. Thank you.

 

[EveHarrington]

This society tells us that we need to be independent.....at all costs (as evidenced by that little saying quoted above). Many people buy into it. It just isn't true. Part of being human is helping others and another part is asking for help when necessary. Helping yourself by asking for help isn't in the 'manual' that society prints out today, but it is necessary for balance.

This is very true! I bought into this lie myself for so very long. It's a lonely place to be. I still don't like asking for help but I'm slowly working through this issue. Very S-L-O-W-L-Y as its hard for me to trust. I think it requires a little leap of faith and then when the response is positive, you think hey, maybe I really can learn to ask for help from others!


Smile,

I don't see a pity party? I see someone who is frustrated with how things are and is venting about that. I think that while you want help, perhaps they don't know how to help you. Sadly mental illness is oftentimes not well understood and not taken as seriously as physical ailments. Regardless, you still deserve help and it is disappointing when family members aren't there to offer much support.

 

[Sandstone]

I'm going to ask that question I hate. Do you know what would help? What would you like your family to do, beyond being there?

 

[Smile]

@EveHarrington , yes! My sister even said that she doesn't know how to help because she doesn't fully understand what I'm gong through

 

[Smile]

I'm going to ask that question I hate. Do you know what would help? What would you like your family to...

No... I don't :( and that is very frustrating for me. I think it connects to the fact that I don't really have hope for myself... Maybe what I want is people to have hope for me. No, that's not it. I DONT want them saying, "we know you'll get through this".

It's just that I use all my brain power jut to survive each day that I don't have any brain left to have any ideas

 

[ladee]

Possibly another conversation with sis... this time, simply telling her I am exhausted, I need help finding a counselor, I need to talk to someone and get some help... because I don't know what is going on. I need help to find out.

 

[Smile]

Possibly another conversation with sis... this time, simply telling her I am exhausted, I need help findin...

Thanks but I think I need to try to not constantly "want/need" my family to understand.

I have a T and a psychiatrist. The P gives me more compassion than my T although I know T understands. It's just that she's so goal oriented and sometimes I just want to vent/share... And she'll listen but that's it. Won't respond or give me any real understanding on her part.

This is my first T who is a trauma specialist. Until her all my T's were just regular and I looked forward to the sessions as a place where I can vent and understand things better.

I don't know. I just feel so alone in this f'ed up world

 

[Sideways]

@Smile - I had a psych that used to do something like that. It was 100% behavioural approach. I'd go in hoping to get a chance to do a massive brain-dump, but instead all she wanted to talk about was what activities I was doing to fill up every last nanosecond of my day.

It got too exhausting for me & eventually I left and I'm glad I did/. My T spends a lot of time reminding me that, all things considered, I function pretty darn well & pushing me to do more & more & more is only going to make me crash under the unrealistic expectations.

But that's iust how it was for me:)