Other Today I Self Harmed

[Heather]

I feel for you. I used to cut my arms when I was younger. I needed stitches on about 4 different occasions. And when I was doing it, I NEVER felt the pain either.

I hope you tell your therapist and they can help you find better ways of coping.

Good luck tomorrow. Best Wishes.

Heather.

 

[Riot]

@Jnean, thank you, that's very nice of you to say.

@Heather, that's the last time I did, until recently. Although, I stopped when I was a teenager after I hacked my arm with a meat cleaver in blind rage. I did quite some damage. Also, thank you for the well wishes.

 

[RavenGirl]

@Riot, show her if you need to. Even if that means showing her in words. Write it down ahead of time, let her read it if that's easier. Just make sure you are able to get it out. I do that a lot, that way I don't forget or Try to minimize what happened between seasons. She (my T ) thinks it is a good coping /communication method. Do what you need to do to get out what you need to say. Oh, by the way pulling teeth to get info is part of why they are paid to do what they do. Sometimes they pull the info, sometimes we willingly give it. ;) Hang in there, you are SOOOOO WORTH IT! ! ;):tup::hug:

 

[Riot]

@RavenGirl, I'm not entirely sure I'm 'worth' it, but thank you for your kind words.

 

[Milo's papa]

I don't really know why I decided to take my kitchen knife and slash the top of both of my arm several time...

Oh Riot, I'm so sorry things are going so hard fo you righ now.
As far as telling your T about it, you do whatever is the most comfortable for you right now. The last thing you need is to put any extra preasure on yourself.
My thoughts are with you. Take care of yourself, Please!

Riot, you are worth everything to this world, that is why you were put here in the first place.

 

[RavenGirl]

@Riot, you are! I don't say things I don't believe! That's the PTSD talking. Don't give in, don't give up, you are beautiful, You deserve to be loved, you deserve peace, you deserve kindness, from yourself too. :inlove::hug::hug::hug::hug:

 

[Riot]

@Milo's papa and @RavenGirl, thank you.

 

[sun seeker]

When you tell your therapist, however you tell, please be sure to bring up the fact that you didn't feel it, in addition to your anger/frustration. That is important information. I think it means you are self harming while dissociated, but your therapist would know better than I. Just please be sure to tell him/her because people self harm for a lot of different reasons and you want him/her to be able to give you the right kind of help.

 

[Anarchy]

Hi Riot,
You are worth it!

The idea of short sleeves is a really good one. You might also write the words that you struggle with, with a soft pen, so that the T can see them too?

Sending you kind thoughts.

 

[Riot]

@sun seeker, I agree that I am self harming while dissociated, for sure.

@Anarchy, I am contemplating it. I feel like it'll force me to either keep my jacket on or just get it out in the open. Either way it'll be awkward and uncomfortable. I hate myself so much.

 

[Anarchy]

I hate myself so much.

Sending caring hugs
That feeling is so frequent and so difficult to put a dent in

Good luck with the T
@

 

[Riot]

Thanks, @Anarchy. Heading off here in a few minutes. I'm going to just go a few minutes early and sit while listening to some loud music. Be well.