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for me, i think being myself equals spontaneity. no second guessing myself. no need to psychoanalyze myself at every turn. just stop, plop and off you go. admitting freely when i am human enough to make mistakes and freely making amends when needed.

hello misslala. welcome to the forum. your message is quite understandable. i love machine translators! i am not going to psychoanalyze a person i have never met, but it sounds rather typical of the virtual romances i have witnessed. i have never had a virtual romance, but i know i am always...

i don't believe anybody of any age should go through the damages of child sex trafficking, but since i quit trying to rewrite my past, i have been able to build a life i am rather proud of, despite that dismal past. i also believe the journey from survivor to thriver has given me insights and...

the zen proverb i like for being okay with not knowing is: if i don't understand, it is what it is. if i do understand. it is what it is. knowing why seldom changes anything, whatsoever.

good luck getting me anywhere near that debate. at 71, with no way to either confirm or deny the memories which have emerged from my trauma induced amnesia therapy, i deal with the strictly personal realities daily. attempt to sort my personal confusions during a political debate? not going to...

hello thefault. welcome to the forum. your post is far more complex than i would care to approach in a single sitting. i am a HUGE believer in breaking my problems down into bite sized chunks and approaching them in manageable portions. i just wanted to welcome you aboard.

i often think losing a good thing looks harder than being born into the hopeless cesspool of despair of the kiddie whorehouses. mine was rough, but i was richer for most of what i lost. i can't even imagine losing the promise of a bright future.

recovering child prostitute here. the places where i feel normal are not desirable places to be. still, over the years of living my freakazoid life, i have come to believe that each of us is unique. my pain is not greater. it is not less. it is simply different from all the rest. when you...

i still mostly feel this way, but i always feel better after i nudge myself past it.

support groups. this was before the internet, so the support groups were all in real time.

hello hope. welcome to the forum. sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are here. in my own case, as a child sex trafficking survivor, december is a long string of trauma anniversaries. so much so that i declared december to be, "therapy month." i was far from alone in the need. my...

hello aimfor. welcome to the forum. sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are here. empathy on the dilemmas attached to traumatic injustices. in my own case, i'm not sure which is worse, the emotional or the physical repercussions. both have inspired me to every emotion from rage to...

decades ago i had a sib-in-healing offer me a pack of razor blades on a day like this. she had bought them, just for me, in anticipation of our meeting. her offer helped me more than all the syrupy platitudes put together. it invited me to look more deeply at my desires to self-terminate. it...

that most certainly fits my profile. given my personal druthers, me, myself and i is more membership duty than i can handle. still. . . i am here and continue to gain healing for the effort. yup, i know. saying nice things has a way of attracting those human human critters, but. . . fake it...

congratulations on your achievement, mach. for my psycho nickel, "pretty good" is worthy of celebration. for what it's worth i endured my child sex trafficking experiences with 5 brothers and 5 sisters. my 5 sisters and i were able to find help. my brothers tried to find help and got profiled...

hello ocean. welcome to the forum. sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are here. the meanest of my childhood abusers were women. girl, howdy, i have a hard time loving myself for all the hatred i hold for women. i'll spare you the woman bashing rant which supports my hatred. i'm trying...

hello deer. welcome back from another old fart. we are the same age. i married a younger man, but i don't hold that detail as too awful important. he's a workaholic who has been working himself into an early grave. i hold you are still experiencing ptsd, with the added flourish of a changed...

welcome charlee listening

hello muffin. welcome to the forum. i regret to report that i have a great deal of experience. i am a child sex trafficking survivor who started my recovery with full trauma induced amnesia. i thought forgetting was a good thing, but hard experience taught me otherwise. this has been true in...

i estranged from my birth family --complete with the parentalized (?) expectations-- in my early 20's, 50 years ago, so i missed the end-of-life dramas for both parents, but your dilemma has me remembering Piedad, my sponsor in ecuador. she was the youngest of 8 siblings. by ecuadorian...

hello star girl. welcome to the forum. sorry for what brings you here but glad you are here. personally, i leave the crazy debate for philosophy and politics. it is a crazy world we live in. what is the value of sanity in an insane world? yes, i am crazy. i am a child of the world i live in. of...

just attempted humor. some jokes work better than others. sorry for the confusion.

works still in progress. my golden years have added new dimensions to the work, especially since fate decreed i start a second parenting career at age 65, derailing all my personal projects in the process. always something, huh? when i get to feeling like i don't matter, i look for little...

all that peer support has put me on both sides of the ptsd help desk. for my psycho nickel, the suffer side is the easier side of the proverbial help desk. ptsd is even less logical on the outside than it is on the inside and the sufferers get all the good drugs to help them cope. in my own...

hello tia. welcome to the forum. sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are here. in my long, hard recovery from child sex trafficking, peer support has been the most consistent source of support and insights in sorting my own "truth puzzle." i started my recovery with trauma induced...