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The boundaries are crucial. That’s the only way to stop yourself from getting sucked into it. Not only setting the boundaries, but enforcing them. Your daughter may spiral a little in response, but honestly, something else may make her spiral. At least the boundaries are healthy for both of you...

Isolation can be a coping method for some sufferers. The situation in Iran is not helping at all. Is this the first time you’re dealing with isolation? The first time sucks, just because you don’t know what you’re dealing with. If this is the case, take a deep breath and reset. He is still...

Actions can be louder than words. How is he treating you today?

You are absolutely not responsible for “retraumatizing” her. You were not abusive. She was triggered/retraumatized/whatever. You did not trigger her. She was triggered. As in, what is happening is happening in her perception or in her head. That does not make it reality. You left her side for 2...

Give yourself some of the grace you give him.

It’s more than just missing somebody… it’s terrifying if your loved one is having a mental health issue and just disappears. From the supporter side it sucks to wonder if they’re safe and to not know whether or not they’ll come back. It’s all well and good to respect their needs, but yours...

I’m sorry you’re going through all this @MyBestLife

As a supporter, I get it. It’s hard not to be worried sick if you think something is off. However, you cannot let your fear and anxiety override somebody’s boundaries. Boundaries and trust are a huge deal for people with PTSD. It’s hard to earn, and hard to keep. Let me reframe this situation...

Not every behavior is PTSD related. But even if it was, is this how you deserve to be treated? If it’s not ok for anybody else to treat you like this, it’s not OK for him to, just because he has PTSD.

Good to hear from you @amethist Positive stories are too few and far between. It’s nice to see a successful relationship!

When she says you are being passive aggressive, are you doing something to be passive aggressive or is that just her perception. When she says you’re being untrustworthy, are you doing something to really be untrustworthy? Don’t let her perceptions cloud your reality. You know you are not...

It’s hard to tell. He may have PTSD, or he may not. Just because he served doesn’t mean he has PTSD… even if he deployed, and even if he experienced terrible things. What you do know is that he is ghosting you after you were intimate for the first time. Does it matter why? That’s a dick move...

Fires happen everywhere. He can’t run from triggers.

This is the supporter section of the forum. Sufferers: You MUST read this thread, prior to posting

I’m sorry things are so erratic when you are expecting. That’s stressful enough without any outside factors. The only advice I can give you is to stop owning his shit. I know it’s a supporter knee-jerk reaction because you love him and you’re empathetic, but you have to train yourself to stop...

Let’s keep in mind what part of the forum we are in. This is the supporter area. Let’s not make assumptions and lash out at people trying to get a wee bit of support for themselves. If something over here rubs you the wrong way, move along to the PTSD side.

Don’t beat yourself up for getting emotional. It happens sometimes. Isolation from a partner can be very stressful, especially if you are concerned for their safety. And yes, even if you’re used to isolation periods. If his emotions are causing the isolation, then shouldn’t he have a little...

You cannot help, you can just support. Often times supporters try to fix. We cannot fix any of this.

Do you consider it isolation because he isn’t spending time with you? Or did he cut off communication?

Perhaps reframe your thinking. This is a very common supporter pitfall. Your main focus is the relationship because you’re feeling hurt. He is not in that mode right now. Why isn’t his explanation valid? PTSD is a broken stress response, and it may a case of him having a full cup and zero...

I don’t blame her. It’s not just his life that is affected. They’re a family. They have kids. She’s allowed to be pissed. He made a choice to keep it from her, and he took her choices away by hiding it. So basically the entirety of their marriage… all the time she’s thinking everything is ok...

You have to take an honest look at yourself and ask the question “do I have the emotional bandwidth and patience for a relationship like this?” It is perfectly fine not to want that, and it’s just as fine to decide to try. A few tips from a supporter…take it for what you will. When people are...

There is no way to know that for sure. Manipulators get PTSD too.

You were probably panicked and highly stressed for a period of time. It’ll take a little time to come down from that. Plus now your have to come down and process everything while tap dancing on eggshells as to not stress HIM out any more. Your emotions are valid as well. Your stress is real...

I’m sorry you’re going through this. The eggshells suck. The avoidance sucks worse.