Relationship PTSD ?

[northshoregirl40]

Been dating a Combat Vet with PTSD for a couple months .

Everything has been so wonderful. He has treated me well, I am lucky to have him .

At the beginning of our relationship, he asked me how I felt about periods of silence. I guess I didn't put two and two together at the time when he was referring to, so I said well as long as we can check in with one another and know each other is still present. That's fine. After all, we both have children. He also had mentioned he was an acquired taste.

We've done a week and trip together, sleepovers during the week, just weekends at our homes together, etc. One week he was telling me how content he was, how we had a really good relationship, and that he loved me.

Five days later, it's like he completely shut down. When I went to his house, he was quieter than normal. For the first time ever, his shades to his deck were closed. Typically, he people watches, and he has cameras, pointing outside. He noticed I was tapping I was fidgeting my hand, even though I was under my own blanket and he said I looked nervous . When we went to bed, it's almost like intimacy was performative because I thought it felt like he felt he needed to take care of me. After intimacy, I mentioned that I was OK with not having it that night and I would've been more than fine rubbing his back and his hand. Which I did both of these use for about an hour before we went to bed.

Then the silence early started. I haven't seen him since March 3. Texting isn't really happening I might get a acknowledgment once in a while and he's used phrases, such as I'm busy, still working, etc.

I feel he's starting to come back. Our conversations are getting a little bit longer via text .

Does this sound like a PTSD response? All of the started when things started ramping up in the news in the Middle East.

 

[Sideways]

Does this sound like a PTSD response?

Sounds textbook ptsd. There’s other potential explanations, but given he warned you this was something he goes through, it’s likely ptsd.

 

[Sweetpea76]

Isolation can be a coping method for some sufferers. The situation in Iran is not helping at all.

Is this the first time you’re dealing with isolation? The first time sucks, just because you don’t know what you’re dealing with. If this is the case, take a deep breath and reset. He is still communicating and he warned you he does this, so those are pluses.

A few tips from somebody who’s well versed in isolation… don’t panic. He’ll feed off your energy. If he needs space to feel better, giving him space is a loving act. Also, it’s ok to not be ok with a relationship like this. Give yourself as much grace as you give him.