5 Things I'm Thinking Today

[Anrish]

1. That's all for today.
2. Wash machine is driving me crazy.
3. Piano went well.
4. No time during this week.
5. Argh, where am I?!

 

[jaccat]

That was a new one at work. It even had the bosses baffled.
I so need another holiday.
36 hours wide awake, and counting. I couldn't even feel it up until 2 hours ago. Bad timing, driving to yoga. That moment when you realise the car is the one in control.
Not going to let myself react over what happened at the end of the yoga session. I tried to explain about the hypermobility, but if they insist on thinking I can't do it because I'm weak or afraid that's their issue. Pretty sure the new teacher will figure out I'm not, fast enough.
Memories are becoming harder to manage. Just great.

 

[Muttly]

@ladee hahaha... that damn Laundry Fairy lies to me too
@Rain sorry for the hard day

1) Total mood crash today. blah.
2) it's always so weird when Im having friendly, fun-type conversation at the same time someone inside is flipping out and going on adn on and on and on about self-harm and even having sui thoughts. it's such a dichotomy and so crazy feeling. Especially since I can fool my own T. she sort of confirmed my fear that it really doesn't show.
3) got to get moving fairly soon. blah
4) heh, apparently "blah" is my word of the day.
5) not eating won't help. I should make the effort to put food in my stupid body

 

[expectingbetter]

God, please get her better, please save her.
This is getting harder and harder.
Depression won't let me go.
I can't. But I have to.
Tears just go by.

 

[BM2A]

I'm relieved, thankful, that I've found put my little girl is OK, she's going to be fine, she does not have anything bad... Just total relief

I can breathe

I might calm down now

Just focusing on one hour at a time

My reality for this hour is good :)

 

[user44376]

-Why have my nightmares started again?
-I’m so f*ckin hungry but my ED is killing me.
-Feel like I’ll never have my life back.
-Scared because hitting myself doesn’t tone down the hyperarousal anymore. Thinking about cutting.
-starting to believe all medications are a f*cking scam.

 

[mumstheword]

1.The thought occured today, that I ordered exogenous ketones and that that could be the relief I'm so desperately needing, right when I'm thinking I need drugs or something, can't handle this.

2.Such a hard day, I had to sleep to put myself out of my misery

3.My morale is low, but my family, son and partner, said such lovely things to me,
apparently I am awesome.
4.Zentagling is helping.

5.So tired of this; tried to go into the doctors to make an appointment but my social avoidance was too great.

 

[Teasel]

☆ Can hear a bird chittering, don't recognise which kind.
☆ Feel sick with nerves over human interaction. Even on line. Even here.
☆ Need to fill self up somehow
☆ Shall increase meditation.
☆ And bite the bullet and interact with ppl.

 

[Chiqui]

Today, 9 years ago, I started theraphy. I was terrified and hyperactivated. My Life started to change from that day :D

I have change, too. Meds have been able to calm me down, and now, most of the time, do not live in a nightmare.

Family has helped, on its way...my hubby has been a constant support .

But I have been the one who everyday fighted for "having a Life" bearable.

I am on my way. Sure, difficulties will came, but somethings have changed forever.

 

[Anrish]

1. @expectingbetter *sends comforting hugs*
2. So tired...second night without much sleep...
3. I begin to dislike my grandmother more and more...how she treats my family and me...and how she favours my stupid aunt.
4. I found my voice again.
5. T tomorrow.

 

[Ronin]

1. So many questions if this means that and too ashamed to ask.
2. Apparently I was all tranquilo in that hell of a decade&, but now with some ActuallyTranquilo time I'm a terrified shaky mess. :bored: Just stellar. Someone throw me an emergency, pretty please. I want to get back to collected. Seemingcollected. Numbenough. Or whatever the f*ck I was.
3. TSNF.
4. Cute dates & normal things like trash talking music, pardon, talking about new records. (Except I chicken out every f*cking time because the other day with cute dates -- nevermind.)
5. TSNF. (Hello self, it's not the other -7 ending years.)

 

[Anrish]

1. ...what a mess.
2. Do I talk some kind of foreign language?!
3. Sigh.
4. I feel a bit left alone...
5. .More present but tired.