a living nightmare that wont let go.

[mando1]

a living nightmare that wont let go.

Hello amigos, my name is armando but you can call mee mando. i am so overwhelm with joy being able to communicate with someone like me. i am going through some serious changes ever since i let my wife know about my disorder. since then it seems as if she uses it as an escape goat for her daily activities such asw she told me so i hear that all the time is it me or is it true? now i have been isolated to my shop for the past 9months she seems happier with our kids alone and doesnt bother to care about me. i was never like this before why cant i move on? couldm it mbe ptsd? aside from my personal issues i have been in the military as an infantry soldier, posted up on the DMZ then i also ended up in prison for almost twelve years three of those i ended up in the hole. There is alot of issues i need help advice or maybe just a friend who can listen to me instead of making me feel guiltty for being in her life. she encourages me to take myself out, i dont need that as a partner this is why i told her to drop me off at the shop last night. i wanted to start my new year at home instead i find myself in my shop with no heater and no food. Ill survive no need for sym, but i like to be open hearted. thanks for allowing me to enter.

 

[BioHazard]

Welcome, Mando! We've all been where you are right now. There is no cure for PTSD, only ways of coping with it. If you have not done so already, You should contact your local V.A. Medical Center and seek the assistance of a therapist of psychiatrist. It sounds to me like your wife is trying to distance herself and the children from you because she does not understand the disorder. As far as her encouraging you to "take yourself out", that type of behavior is unacceptable. She needs to seek psychiatric care as well, or possibly have someone tell her to stop acting childish.

Like you, I spend a lot of time in my shop, mainly because I find that working with my hands gives me a chance to let my mind wander aimlessly and relieves stress. If you don't have a hobby, I would encourage you to find something that you enjoy doing, that you can do without having to actually think about it, and allow yourself to do that for a period of time each week. I personally spend about 2 hours a day in my garage, just tinkering around with whatever captures my attention, as it seems to relieve some of my stress, and allows me to unwind without working at it.

Another thing I would suggest is to start keeping a journal of day to day episodes. In it, record your feelings about occurrences, things that trigger your temper, arguments you have with your spouse, or even just random thoughts you have. I record memories that come back to me, as well as things I find that help me hold my temper. It's completely up to you. Also, if you start seeing a doc on a regular basis, you can discuss the things in your journal, and the doc might be able to help you gain insight into it. It helps a lot to understand why your brain reacts the way it does to certain situations.

We're all here to help out, and we've all been through things that give us problems, but it helps us to understand one another. Feel free to ask us if you have any questions, or just need someone to talk to.

Again, Welcome!
-James

 

[Jimmy1]

Hey Mando,

Welcome to the forum, my name is James, or whatever you feel like calling me.:D

Its a tough one mate. I am a single father now and enjoy life, although it has its moments, but I did not know I had the disorder until it was too late for my marriage.

Bio is right, there is help available, even for your spouse to understand the disorder. If you can still communicate with her, get her to look at the other forum as there is an area for carers, and also lots of info there.

I was happy to find this site too as I knew that everyone here (although they might not have the same symptoms), had PTSD.

Anyway, enjoy the rest of the Year mate. :D:D:D

 

[raydarluvr1]

Hola, Mando. Welcome. I look forward to seeing your posts. :)

 

[anthony]

Hey mando... welcome mate.