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I read these backwards. Then I grabbed my book of inspirational thoughts for girlfriends and began reading. Catching up, since I haven't picked it up since the 3rd. The most recent was about finding time for myself, but I have more then enough of that time, so it didn't register. But the other days were about finding joy in life. That I definitely need to read. About letting go of the past, and I am not thinking of the stuff of PTSD, but other things that I really should let go. Though, let's face it, letting the PTSD go, or being able to, would be freeing. I do want to find joy.
 
Last night I had a helpful, soothing massage. But before it my daughter had a tantrum, so it was stressful and hard to leave. When I returned, she had another huge one, my husband doesn't know how to manage her at all, so she has so many tantrums with her, and I am feeling so stressed knowing that and trying to manage my own stress level. But, I let myself sleep in, I was short on sleep again.

Today.... I don't know what to do to help myself. I think I will try a new technique from my DBT workbook that my therapist mentioned yesterday: I will focus on someone else. I signed up to write a letter to a soldier, but didn't hear back, so I will look for another organization where I can do that today. I'm afraid to be too tired for anything, but maybe if I refocus on that, on helping someone else, it will do us both good and I'll find the energy. :)
 
I'm trying to take an easy-going day today, but it is VERY difficult to just sit and relax.

How does one just chill and relax? I plan something, but run into other things, then worry about all I need to do. (This could also be my ADD, but I literally have not been able to slow down even my thoughts this week. It sucks.)

And how does everyone make sure they are taking care of themselves: sleeping, eating, etc.? (I am planning small goals "3 meals a day, remember", but losing time and finding I've skipped 2 meals again. I even have a reminder alarm, but still struggling. Why is basic functioning so difficult?)
 
But the other days were about finding joy in life. That I definitely need to read. About letting go of the past, and I am not thinking of the stuff of PTSD, but other things that I really should let go. Though, let's face it, letting the PTSD go, or being able to, would be freeing. I do want to find joy.


I look forward to reading your journey towards joy.

It certainly would be freeing.
 
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Today.... I don't know what to do to help myself. I think I will try a new technique from my DBT workbook that my therapist mentioned yesterday: I will focus on someone else. I signed up to write a letter to a soldier, but didn't hear back, so I will look for another organization where I can do that today.

What DBT workbook are you working on? What is the exercise about. That sounds interesting.[DOUBLEPOST=1389482771][/DOUBLEPOST]I am going to clean the house for when my friends arrive.
 
Here's a link to the workbook. I enjoy it very much, though I'm not too far in: Dead Link Removed

This exercise is about turning my attention outward: I am often very much in my head, and finding something worthwhile outside my overwhelming emotions can help me keep a little better sense of balance and meaning in my life. One of the exercises lists three ways to focus on others: people watch (like at a cafe), focus on people who've cared about and supported me (I LOVE that one, I really need to practice it a lot, the sense of being cared for evaporates when I am triggered or very upset), and doing something to help others, which is what I did today. I signed up here to write letters to a deployed soldier looking for support: Dead Link Removed
 
I *almost* wish I could forget to eat. I am 40 lbs overweight, hope to lose 15 of it in the next several weeks, that's a goal of mine, eat more healthy foods like vegetables, fruits, and soups, less things like pizza, cheese, junk food, etc. Gained 5lbs during the holidays, at least my house doesn't look like a candy shop/all you can eat buffet anymore!

Today, I need a recuperative day. My life last week was an emotional triathlon, so today I aim to sit quietly, do my homework and watch some movies. I plan to go to a fabric store too- I talked to my therapist about how easy it is to lose sight of feeling cared for, and I was inspired to create a quilt: one square for each of the wonderful nurturing women who've been in my life, however briefly. Even imagining being wrapped up in that quilt is comforting
 
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