Childhood Adult Children Of Narcissists....

[user27357]

I am finding so much info about religious narcissists. I don't think a religion necessarily enables or causes a narcissist to develop, but the kind of power and superiority that is quickly achieved by studying and following the rules of a strict religion and seeking the positions of responsibility and power within the church or cult is a strong magnet for people predisposed to having a narcissistic disorder. This is definitely the case for both my father and stepmother, he was concerned about appearances before truth his whole life, she never had any power in her life before she found she could gain notoriety as a strict follower of their chosen religion.

For whatever reason a narcissist parent becomes the horrible parent that they are, no doubt they leave horrible injuries on their children.

 

[Emi]

@enough Did you happen to sign up for the email list from Michelle Piper of Narcissistic Mothers? Every email I have gotten from her resonates so soundly with me....

 

[user27357]

still doing my own research, working a full time job, seeing a new T and various home activities including cutting cords of wood per week so.......no, not yet.

 

[ReachingOutJ]

I know this is an older post, but I feel the need to chime in and say that I am also an adult child of an NPD mother, and it is HELLISH.

 

[Flossy]

@Emi I wonder if it was me you spoke with. I was on a couple of forums for Daughters of Mothers with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
I always tend to alert anyone I can see the dynamic in and I seem to recall talking with someone with that story of the mother wanting to come in for the birth. I can't remember now my username on there. Usually something to do with Faeries or Flossy. I believe so many PTSD sufferers non-combat are suffering because of families with a Narcissist in charge.

There can be other siblings who also become Narcissists and usually a Golden Child and a Scapegoat. Sometimes they are combined.
The parent with NPD usually targets the most sensitive child to use as a scapegoat and trains the other siblings to do the same.

There is another forum run by someone called Light and it has Lighthouse in the name. She will actually answer any questions you have about a specific problem, personally within 24 hours.

After studying NPD for over five years now, I also have a bit of fun sometimes googling words like 'how to fk with a narcissist" . If you study it well within a couple of years you will be able to identify one within minutes of being in their company. Kind of like realising there is a vamire in the room.

My Narc mother died 11 months ago. I still feel relieved every time I remember that.

You are doing the right thing to study it, it will help greatly in improving all of your PTSD symptoms because you will see the source was not to do with anything you did, despite what they told you.

 

[hodge]

My mother is a narcissist, too. Since I was 11, whenever I didn't agree with her -- even on the most trivial thing, such as whether I liked a certain garment or not -- she would throw a total hissy fit in public and accuse me of all kinds of nasty things so all could hear. This became the biggest reason I did not want to go shopping with her. And it was a weekly struggle, because her idea was that my duty as a daughter was to go shopping with her whenever and wherever she liked. This may not sound like an abusive situation to most, but the thing was (aside from the fact that she couldn't really afford to buy me clothes that often) if I didn't do with her whatever she wanted to do and agree with whatever she said, she would berate me, and sometimes it would turn into suicide threats. She would actually take her insulin (she's type I diabetic) and drive off saying she might never see us again. I hate to admit it, but sometimes, I wished that were true. She'd also sometimes took out her syringe and insulin if she was upset at us and threaten to overdose. One time my younger brother bravely took them away from her. He was stronger than me. That was a particularly memorable occasion.

 

[Sammyiam]

I think my mother would count as one as well .

 

[hodge]

Oh, Emi, I just started reading the article you posted, but couldn't read it very far. I had to stop when it talked about mothers who have children so they won't be alone later in life. My mom actually told me that that's why she had us. I can't say anything else at the moment. I'll be okay. Going back to bed with my safe hubby soon.

 

[Elevatorguy]

I am finding so much info about religious narcissists. I don't think a religion necessarily enables or ca...

Agree 100 percent

 

[PTSDfree]

I thought for years that my mom had NPD because I could relate to a lot of stories about narcissistic mothers. She really had borderline as a result of being raised by my narcissistic grandma (plus living with my druggie teen mom aunt). I hadn't even heard of it until she killed herself. Might be something to keep in mind.