General Alternatives To Comfort Eating?

[Sighs]

Lately I have been doing a lot of comfort eating. I have put on a little bit of weight but nothing really noticeable. Of course, if I keep comfort eating that won't be the case!

Any suggestions for what to do when I'm upset, stressed, sad, lonely etc other than eat food I know I shouldn't?

 

[qwyoey]

Comfort eating is really about affect regulation. I used to do it myself. Finally now I've started therapy I've been able to stop. I put on a lot of weight doing this over the years, and have gone through the excruciating process of losing it all to be a normal size now. It's a coping mechanism, but one that can really harm you in the long term. I think it's really really good to keep track of the times you feel compelled to comfort eat in a journal, and also notice what you were thinking, doing, or if anything directly affected you. That has helped me immensely.

 

[ms spock]

I am trying to learn how to emotionally regulate myself so that I am not so emotionally dysregulated that I feel the need to comfort eat.

So I am exercising.
I am disputing those cognitive distortions (David Burns book).
Practising mindfulness - I did an hour and fifteen minutes today I started with 15 minutes morning and night and some times I was on 1 minute three times per day.
I am trying to focus on positive.
I am working in therapy.
I am talking to people.
I am learning new skills.
I am trying to ground and stay in my body.
I am building distress tolerance.
I am reading appropriate books.
I focus on gratitude. Three things per day.
There are so many things that you can do!
I practice honesty. (Hard for me given my family background)
I cheer other people along in their recovery.
I do service for my community.
I tend to disco dancing and fun and frivolity.
I make goals in healing and work towards them.
I try to do three things each day to make the world a better place.
I try and support other people on this forum.

Areas I want to go to:
http://self-compassion.org/the-three-elements-of-self-compassion-2/
http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/instant_mindfulness.html

I recently had three days of feeling good and not comfort eating. It was amazing to be self regulated emotionally. Imagine living a life like that imagine what you could do!

 

[Wastinglight]

Yes, I do this too. I am normally very conscious of my health, but for the past 6-7 months (since my relationship with my guy has become serious), I have pretty much been eating what I want, which mostly consists of a lot of junk food.

For me, I think it's mostly because of my anxiety disorder. From what I've read, research suggests that people experiencing a lot of anxiety crave sugar.

It's also because I only have so much willpower. When I'm barely holding myself together emotionally, I cannot even contemplate trying to regulate my eating. My brain is already full. This phenomenon also seems to be backed up by research.

This happens to me every now and then. I think I'm finally in the right headspace to regulate my eating now though. Normally I eat my way through stressful times, but despite the stress of the argument with my guy yesterday, I did not resort to overeating.

The reason for my newfound control is that I have finally decided that I am going to pursue a career as a Pilates instructor. So in order to do that, I need to be fit and healthy. And I've been steadily putting on weight the past 6 months, so I have to stop it now. So far, I'm finding it pretty easy, because I'm focused on my career change.

Is there something you really want to achieve that you can link to eating healthy?

 

[Sweetpea76]

I stress eat too, and after a bad marriage and nasty divorce, my weight ballooned. I just recently lost a massive amount of weight, and I figured a way to deal with my stress eating.

A lot of it was just realizing that I WAS stress eating. It is so easy to just mindlessly eat without paying attention. Once I figured out I was doing it just to make myself feel better I was able to quit doing it as much. Then I distracted myself with other projects or activities. Sometimes I'd even break down and polish my nails just to keep from eating... can't eat with wet nails ya know...

I also had to accept that if I broke down and snacked it wasn't the end of the world. I just had to balance it out. I'd do extra time at the gym... calories in, calories out. I also keep healthy low carb snacks in the house. If I have to snack it is better to grab some nuts or cheese than chips and cookies.

 

[Friday]

I pay attention to my cravings... They tell me a lot about what is going on with my body.

Common female case in point? About once a month I want steak. Now. Hand over the cow. Easy answer... My iron is low. I can feed the craving just as OMFG, that's good, with spinach. Spinach Gomae, Spinach Caesar Salad, even a great big handful on a roast beef sandwich (cow + spinach ;)) is gonna have about 2,000 fewer calories than a porterhouse beaut of a marbled char grilled steak. It "shouldn't" feel as satisfying to sub a salad for steak (ever. that's just wrong), but if I'm craving iron? It does.

Junk food? Usually means my anxiety is up. Which means my digestive system isn't working well (sympathetic nervous system shuts off digestion) so I'm craving foods that require virtually no digestion whatsoever. Those are great foods for when you're actually sick, or about to be running for your life, but "A broad should be broad... But not that broad!", ahem, a wee bit fattening for everyday living.

Just like the spinach v steak thing? There's an easy solution; go burn off all the stress chemicals in my bloodstream demanding your sympathetic nervous system be running hot, and all of a sudden? Sympathetic shuts off, Parasympathetic nervous system turns back on, & the digestive system comes back online and wants a salad or clean proteins.

If I'm craving more-more-more? Usually means my trace minerals & vitamins are low, but can also mean my protein is low, or carbs are low, or even fats are too low. Regardless, it means I'm out of balance. Packing on thousands of extra calories of "more" whatever the hell I'm eating... Instead of taking a step back and going "Oh. Maybe I should eat more than just _______." Which is a very, very bad habit of mine... Especially when I'm depressed. This past year I can't even tell you how many times I've been living out of the almond butter jar, or the cereal box. ((LOL. Last time I did this I had to fight to get my sugar & vitamins & proteins up. Was living like a rabbit. This time, I've got those three, at least.)) Okay, woman! Go get yourself some durn variety in your diet!!! Dayum. How many times do you want kwashiorkor in your life??? Or osteoporosis? Yeah. That one was fun. There is a supermarket filled with food from around the world right around the corner. Mind the gaps in your diet, chica.

If I'm craving sugar? I'm usually in pain. I have chronic pain, so I tend to ignore it a lot more than I really should. This is one craving I totally rock out with. Brains run on glucose, absolutely needs it / can't survive without it. What can help to modify the craving here, is to manage my pain better. Lower my activity levels (or increase, depending), do my physical therapy stuff, get back on helpful meds if I've fallen off of the self care, ice & heat, etc. Voila. Sugar cravings subside. Until then, though, I carb load. If I don't I'm not only gonna be one hurting puppy, but I'm going to have the attention span of a gnat. Dumb & Dizzy just isn't a good look for me. ;) Just not pretty enough to pull it off.

 

[Peach]

Is there something you really want to achieve that you can link to eating healthy?

To add to this, I am a visual person. I learn/remember best when I can write things down and see them, I like lists.

I've been over weight since my teen years and just recently found the proper motivation to lose weight...and no it isn't for my health, which should probably be the reason. LOL So, I wrote my reason in a memo on my tablet and pinned it to the menu. I see it there a hundred times a day and it gives me the will power to have popcorn instead of ice cream. A salad with chicken instead of pizza. And it's working! I've lost 40 pounds so far. :D Once you get over the first week, it actually becomes much easier.

Keep your hands busy, make smart choices, and be aware of youself.

I love A&W rootbeer. I switched to diet (no calories) when I was ready to get on the wagon. Well, I noticed that since I quite my job and have been at home soooo often that I've been drinking that soda all day. Not a big deal for the weight loss...just seems like too much. Once I realized that, I made a deal with myself that I am only allowed water (aside from almond milk for breakfast) during the day. Rootbeer is only allowed at dinner time. And I haven't died yet.

 

[Glara]

I too comfort eat. I was very disciplined for many years, and now I'm out of control. I was a little better before I got the stomach bug last week, but that threw everything out of whack. Now all I eat is pasta and Cheezits and other crap. I am trying to eat my morning yogurt, salad and fish lunch and sensible dinner, but I keep throwing junk into the mix. I'm just out of control. I may Google something on how to get my life and focus back and stop comfort eating.

 

[Wastinglight]

Just one other thought - I can sometimes stop myself from overeating junk food by telling myself that it is not actually going to make me feel any better (well, not for long, anyway). I tell myself that I must accept that I'm feeling like crap at the moment, and I need to just sit with my feelings and work through them instead. It doesn't always work but sometimes it's just the ticket. I've been off the junk food for 9 days and counting now, but some days I really have to talk myself out of a trip to the fundraising chocolate box at work. Damn I hate those fundraising chocolate boxes!

 

[ms spock]

I realise that eating is a way to ground and contain myself. I fill myself with food to feel like I am here in this now. It is also about soothing and blocking emotions. Sometimes it is about having something to do. I think the love I got from my mother was about food - so it is trying to connect to a good part of my mother. So I wrote a good list above but I find it hard to connect with that list and actually do those things. But it was the same with mindfulness and exercise in the beginning. It is just lots of practice that is required. Practice of not doing the eating but addressing what the eating is trying to address and do those things for myself in another way.

 

[qwyoey]

With comfort eating, unfortunately you can get into a vicious cycle of addiction. And it take months to really break free. Fed Up is a great documentary about more awareness of whats in your food. To detox myself, my husband and I didn't eat out for four months starting in the winter. Slowly I pulled away from all the triggering foods. I drink tea without sugar. Coffee without sugar. And eat a ton of vegetables.

For me, I wasn't fed at all as a kid for many years. I used to collect change I found on the sidewalk and then go to a gas station and buy whatever I could for a dollar that had the most calories to stay alive. Usually I'd eat canola oil. Sometimes on bread. So when I started having a job as a teenager and had more money to buy food, I was completely lost. Like a toddler- I had no idea how to feed myself. I've been through years of comfort eating. I went through a terrible bout of bulimia because my binges were so out of control. Personally, I feel food addiction is the better term for me.

I'm now almost 8 months into completely and radically changing my eating patterns. I'm down about 80 pounds, with 25 pounds more to go though I'm no longer overweight. I have no more physical pain. My insomnia is greatly reduced.

I've learned to eat such a huge variety of foods. I was super addicted to starches probably because of the chemicals the release into the body. It's like pain killers.

I think the only way out of it is to really know that 1. you need another way to comfort yourself, and 2. break the cycle of eating. It really takes time. I do not recommend trying to cut all the bad stuff out at once. Your body isn't used to it. Just start subbing things out slowly. It can get so much better though. I was so bleak about this but now that we (my husband included) have made all these permanent changes, I don't ever foresee me falling back into the old habits.

Some things that helped:

We don't own a microwave. Everything we cook is on the stove.
We DO own a rice cooker and I make basmati rice which has a low glycemic index for rice.
Our house has almost no processed foods. My husband is naturally thin and it was hard to get him to stop buying junk.
We drink coffee, tea, and water. I don't let my husband buy juice any more.
We make sure to eat fat because it helps with sugar cravings.
We own restaurant containers (cambro storage) and we prep veggies for meals well in advance so there is no reason to be too tired to cook. A quick saute or steam, rice, and a protein or tofu and we have a meal.
We don't even go down the junk food aisles when grocery shopping.
Have someone who you can talk to about this. I have a good friend who doesn't have problems, but has been heavy all her life and we started weight loss together. She's down about 60 pounds. We sometimes text each other pictures of our scale readings.

Start slow- you'll get there.

 

[qwyoey]

Oh and one more thing, be careful with exercising too much/ too strenuously when you try to break the addiction cycle. For some people this can actually INCREASE your cravings. First establish a balance on just your diet.