An Appology To Anyone That Will Receive It...

[lostforgottensoul]

I figured it out!!! Yay for know code! Its not html and nothing hard but damn thats awesome! Its [ Spoiler ] without the spaces, thats too simple for me to not have figured it out sooner!

 

[Neverthesame]

Lol. Well no idea how you did it by accident but hey, whatever works. :hilarious::tup:

 

[lostforgottensoul]

For staff, Just so i dont get blocked for trying to figure out codes as an inpaid person, im gonna go paid, i just need to make sure i have money for my Drs, im not trying to cheat the site or anything. This spoiler thing will help me not annoy others with long replies!

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Lol. Well no idea how you did it by accident but hey, whatever works. :hilarious::tup:

I figured out the code by accident and dummy me ahould have k ow it was the same quote code. Just like the smilies arent there but by replying it shows you the dots : hilarious : is :hilarious: and : tup: is :tup:

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Yay! Now i dont have to annoy everyone until i can become a paid person!

 

[lostforgottensoul]

This is quite brilliant actually. I hadn't thought of this in quite this way. It makes great sense. Externalizing.

Well its just like drawing, i became an artist with lessons and without knowing i could draw at age 10. I stopped drawing (i havent posted them cause my name's on it, i need to wateemark them thru photoshop and take my name off before posting. I'll send you aome in messages, i just dont want my name public.) Anyway, stopped in '01 cuz i cant stop my head from racing and zero/narrow into the one or the few dmotions i want to draw. The viewer sees these emotions. I did though recently draw Rio, some blue bird in a Pixar or Disney movie, because i was twaching someone. Teaching means im not thinking, im.teaching so the eacing mind isnt there. Ita the same concept. Not that im teaching anyone anything but when helping i dont have that connection to my emotions.

remember that if your posts are wordy (for some) they can glance through them. Not a big deal.

Now that ive figured out the spoiler code, i can do that and that way the post ia short and only long if people want to click on it. I cant put a title on it, it just says "spoiler" but at least that will help til i can be paid.

Filling sketchbooks. Some of it's actually good but the cool part is I don't give a crap, do it mostly for me.

Im my own worst critic. I dont sell them anymore so its not like it matters and ive tried, a lot cause it was mu outlet growing up but i can shut my head up. I draw a narrow or narrowed/zeroed in emotions and the viewer usually sees that emotion. I cant do that now and ive tried (therapiat orders, he's seen my art) but i just get fruatated and thow the book and pencils. I was only able to once when i was teaching someone but then i wasnt thinking.

I would post them here but i think most are water marked with my name. I'll look, a few might not be but i had aome atolen off facebook, my name photshopped out, signed their name and sold it.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@shimmerz i cant send in message, it doesnr have upload file in there. Here's two without my name (dont have all on my phone and except for frogger in color pencil, i dont have him on my phone but i can go get more off facebook and maybe crop my name off) both art acylic with some sharpie marker for detial. @Jemini

 

[Neverthesame]

Wow. That's absolutely lovely. Thanks for posting those.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@shimmerz

Here are some more that i croped my name off of and took one pic from my wall, not sure why its side ways, or why its such a big pic; hhe baby is my friend's baby at 4 months old, he's now almost 15 yrs old. He's the one that i was afraid to bathe because of what i did at 14.
@Jemini

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Wow. That's absolutely lovely. Thanks for posting those.

You're welcome. The painting came out ok, dont like the pencil ones so much, the wine bottle is unfinsihed. Wanted to put some wine glasses crissing over and a rose but just never did. The top of it is crooked, buf i am my own worse critic

 

[Stickler]

Regarding the abuse defining you? I have that problem. I'm starting to get fixed enough to start being annoyed with that.

If you need to talk about it and be believed, talk about it. I believe you. When you have NOT been believed, being believed and listened to can be damn important.

Your art is very good.

I like to think that part of healing is reprogramming or re-brainwashing. There's reasons for that. The self hatred was brainwashed in through fear plus repetition. Well, fear? No. But you can use repetition. Self praise. All the time, even though it seems very wrong.

Too, being kind to yourself despite it being the very last thing you want to do really helps.

Hard, but it works...even in my case with an alter who wanted to bump me off.

Mind you, I suspect it will be a longer battle than myselfs as my parents were not really thinking about how to program me/us. They were just doing their thing.

Your mom/stepdad were actively thinking about how to Program you.

 

[Deleted member 20978]

Lost, those are really nice, you've got talent. Like the horse especially. You're good at composition.