Medical Anger and hopelessness when dealing with the healthcare system

[whiteraven]

I was in the hospital a year ago for a kidney stone. I went through the ER and had to have emergency surgery.

Since then, I've been getting bills, as per usual, but for me, this is more stressful (and that's not even the right word) than going through the actual surgery and recovery.

First, they sent me a bill for the portion of the hospitalization not covered by insurance. As I always do when I am in the hospital (which hasn't been for 16 or 17 years), I requested an itemized invoice. Every time I've gone to the hospital I've discovered they have billed me for things they didn't do or charge outlandish rates for things I could do myself (like $500 a day for the respiratory therapist to come in and turn my own personal CPAP machine on). I had to fight with them for months to get an invoice, and even then it was not itemized. They claimed they couldn't provide that.

About two months ago I got a bill from the emergency room physicians (why it took a year to get it to me I have no idea). They had double-billed me under two different codes. Insurance paid one but not the other. I called the insurance company, and they called the company that billed me, and they said they would rebill (I was on the phone for two hours trying to get this straightened out). I get a thing from my insurance company today, and the visit is STILL double-billed, and I owe nearly $1000.

So, I can calmly (for about 30 secs) tell myself I can call them tomorrow and get it straightened out. But the rest of the time I am ANGRY and sobbing and wishing I could just die.

This happens every single time with medical stuff. I have a very long history of being dismissed, treated like I don't matter, talked down to, and both physically and emotionally harmed by the healthcare system that any contact or anticipated contact with them evokes this reaction.

I don't know how to fix it.

 

[Weemie]

I don't know how to fix it.

I would put the onus of "fixing it" on the people who are responsible for these systemic issues in the first place. Your distress is rational, it's just the level of distress that is problematic (suicidal etc).

I don't have any suggestions on how to ease that, but I fully relate to the absolute fury the North American healthcare system can induce, and I can only imagine how much worse it would be if you had to pay an outrageous bill at the end of it all.

The last time I was in the ER a doctor literally laughed in my face (I was in like 7/10 pain). f*ck 'em.

 

[No More]

I don’t have any answers, but you aren’t alone.
I even get really angry now hearing of people having positive experiences with our healthcare system, because while I am delighted for them, I’m like just once, just f*cking once, why can’t that be me as well.

 

[Rose White]

So, I can calmly (for about 30 secs) tell myself I can call them tomorrow and get it straightened out. But the rest of the time I am ANGRY and sobbing and wishing I could just die.

I understand this. It’s so hard. The only things I know for coping with it are things you already know: breathing and reminding yourself that you are worthy of care and support.

 

[Aliveo]

Totally with you on this...I am in Perth Western Australia and you would not believe what is going on in our Health and Mental Health systems!!!! I wish you well in your journey to sort it all out - the whole thing speaks volumes about the quality of person doing the work not the person accessing the services!!!! Good luck

 

[intothelight]

Here is how I handle medical billing errors.

1. Insurance company- 1 phone call, 1 certified letter w/ a cc to the Dept of Insurance. (They don't like that as they have the authority to revoke their license.) Attach copies of documentation.
2. Hospital/Dr.'s Office- 1 phone call, 1 certified letter w/ a cc to the insurance company, bill from me for over charge and my time. - Attach copies of documentation.

I follow the steps in consecutive order and let them know in the phone call what the progression is. I did have one medical provider take me to court and when I showed the judge my documentation they lost and had to eat the bill. Just remember to document, document, document as they are not use to people questioning and expecting correction. Hope something here may be of use.

 

[Rose White]

@intothelight Inspiring how calm you are about it. Did you have to develop that resilience? Was it ever an emotional event for you or was it always matter-of-fact?

 

[intothelight]

@OliveJewel Because I have been dealing with this cancer for almost 12 years, it was a resilience that I developed. It use to stress me out and cause huge anxiety. So I did a mind shift where I went into what I call "business mode". They are a vendor and I am paying for their services, since I pay an insurance premium, deductible and co-pays. I expect quality service and correct billing, just like I would from the vendors I use in my business. Once I re-framed it and used this as a model, it reduced the stress and with practice it made it even less stressful. I hope this answers your question. Oh, I am better with billing issues than I am with medical screw ups. Medical errors derail me big time.

 

[whiteraven]

Here is how I handle medical billing errors.

1. Insurance company- 1 phone call, 1 certified letter w/ a cc to the Dept of Insurance. (They don't like that as they have the authority to revoke their license.) Attach copies of documentation.
2. Hospital/Dr.'s Office- 1 phone call, 1 certified letter w/ a cc to the insurance company, bill from me for over charge and my time. - Attach copies of documentation.

I follow the steps in consecutive order and let them know in the phone call what the progression is. I did have one medical provider take me to court and when I showed the judge my documentation they lost and had to eat the bill. Just remember to document, document, document as they are not use to people questioning and expecting correction. Hope something here may be of use.

So you are successful? I document everything and send letters to he governing people, but…nothing.