Anxious About Tomorrow

[trying to heal]

It's my T's first day back at work tomorrow after the Christmas break. I haven't seen or heard from her for over a month. I was desperately hoping her receptionist would be able to get me in for an appointment as i was on the waiting list for an early appointment but that didn't happen. I am also feeling super anxious re how she will react to the letter I delivered to her last week. I am still having regular intrusive SI and on a top of that my dr has just changed my meds which I started tonight. Im on them mostly for severe insomnia which leads to a rather nasty downward turn in my mood and ability to cope with life. My previous tablets let me fall into a somewhat broken sleep within 20 mins but these new ones im still feeling very wired yet exhausted at the same time and i took the well over an hour ago.

I really need her to acknowledge my letter but im scared that maybe I didn't make myself clear.

I have no idea how to handle it if I don't hear from her. It will feel like yet another rejection or invaliation and at the moment i dont know if i can handle that from her as she is the only person i can let my gaurd down with.

 

[FauxLiz]

@Cydavies I am sorry you weren't able to get in to see your therapist tomorrow. I know how hard it can be when there have been several weeks between appointments. I hope that you get the response you need from your T for your letter. I am trying to figure out how to word things in a letter to my T right now. I know it took courage to write what ever you did whether she responds or not.

 

[trying to heal]

My T called first thing this morning and got me in for an emergency appointment. It is looking more than likely I will be admitted voluntarily into a sub-acute mental health care unit next week. If I don't agree to go in next week by my own choice I will be sectioned and sent to the acute facility. On so many levels I feel grateful that my T listened and validated my distress but now reality is falling into place and it feels like my world is about to get turned over...I have contracted to say I will stay safe this week.

 

[FauxLiz]

@Cydavies I am glad that you were able to speak to your T. I am sorry that you are at a level that you need to be hospitalized but know that it is better to do so voluntarily than involuntarily. Please keep coming here to help you stay safe until you get admitted.