Are things getting better w/ acceptance of abuse victims?

[Sues]

In the US, the system treats the victim horribly. My abuser has violated the restraining order countless times. Most recently he had a "friend" of his drop off a letter addressed to me. My adult son answered the door and this "friend" threatened my son and us and by the time I made it down the stairs, they were standing toe to toe and this guy was in my son's face screaming at him. My abuser admits to sending the friend and letter. The police sent it to the DA, but I've never heard back. I've left messages with the police detective, but... nothing.

My abuser is my now (Thank God) ex-husband. He's a retired LAPD officer, and the police won't arrest him, and they always 'take his side.' The courts have not helped me. I have no other resources and I continue to suffer stalking and verbal/emotional abuse. It sucks. I can't disclose the really bad stuff because it's not safe to do so.

People don't get it. IF I say anything, which I've stopped doing, people just shake their heads in disbelief and say something like, "He's still bugging you, even after all this time."

 

[prynne]

In the US, the system treats the victim horribly. My abuser has violated the restraining order countless times. Most recently he had a "friend" of his drop off a letter addressed to me. My adult son answered the door and this "friend" threatened my son and us and by the time I made it down the stairs, they were standing toe to toe and this guy was in my son's face screaming at him. My abuser admits to sending the friend and letter. The police sent it to the DA, but I've never heard back. I've left messages with the police detective, but... nothing.

My abuser is my now (Thank God) ex-husband. He's a retired LAPD officer, and the police won't arrest him, and they always 'take his side.' The courts have not helped me. I have no other resources and I continue to suffer stalking and verbal/emotional abuse. It sucks. I can't disclose the really bad stuff because it's not safe to do so.

People don't get it. IF I say anything, which I've stopped doing, people just shake their heads in disbelief and say something like, "He's still bugging you, even after all this time."

That is horrible. I'm sorry that you're going through this. I have heard that restraining orders are pretty useless, from the people I know that have them. I've also had personal experience with the cops refusing to hold their own accountable. It is a massive issue. I never personally tried to tell anyone what was going on with my father when I was a child, but I was aware that if I went to the police I would be talking to his friends and that probably would not go well for me. I had heard enough stories from my father about things being covered up