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At The End Of The Day

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My father was an engineer, gifted and well educated but that doesn't make him emotionally intelligent. The two can be mutually exclusive.

Both my parents were victims of abuse, there was a time as I came to understand how they were victims of abuse that I felt a little sorry for them, that something really horrible must have happened to them to make them become the people they were, but then I realised that they made a choice to behave that way.

Mostly now I just feel disgust at how someone so intelligent could be such a selfish arsehole and abandon us kids to my sadistic mother, it actually makes it feel worse, because if anyone should have known better it was him.
 
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@Hashi ...I did not say it was against forum rules talking about serial killers. It's just triggering for me and very insensitive to mention their names on a forum of abuse victims.
 
someone so intelligent could be such a selfish arsehole and abandon us kids to my sadistic mother, it actually makes it feel worse, because if anyone should have known better it was him.

In my case that's one of my questions...how can someone so intelligent not understand the little girl they were treating is being abused by idiots? They're ALL idiots.

In my grandfathers case I believe he conned good people. In my male sibling I believe it was a case where everyone thought he was a harmless idiot. He drugs his own girlfriends too while his "friends" rape her. He's a Ted Bundy without looks or charm!
 
The coping skills I learned/used from this knowledge still serves my recovery today. Click to expand... Can you explain this?


One good coping skill...

It means I skipped the anger process. Understanding I was surrounded by idiots and out numbered was a turning point. Anger is completely useless.
 
@Notsowild, if it's too much for you I think you need to stay away from the thread. People's sensitivities differ. I think you might be generalising your sensitivity on this issue to other people, but for example you're not speaking for me and my traumas included abuse and murder. So I feel a bit taken aback that you're asking for a discussion to be silenced, because it's triggering for you.

Effectively, what you're asking is for your triggers to decide what other people can talk about. I don't intend to be attacking, I'm just trying to explain how this seems from my point of view.
 
Uhm, my abusers have no power over me.

Hmm..I've tried to give you the benefit of the doubt. However you keep rambling. LOL Each of your post are becoming more vicious. Your "Uhm" has a sharky superior tone. Smugish tone. On the other hand...It's common for abuse victims to lash out.

This particular thread is discussing how abusers blend into society and viola your loudest rant to date. Why is that Solara?


The more you rant.... the likeliness your abusers having no power over you sounds more sinister and an unconscious Freudian slip you are really expressing you have power over your victims. Why do you care how I feel? Why are you so afraid of discussing how abusers function? To close to home for you?

Your abusers have power over you because you write about them in EVERY SINGLE POST here on the forum.

I don't write about them every post. The real question is why do you feel that way?

Concerned about something Solara? Hmmm...things to ponder.
 
@Notsowild, if it's too much for you I think you need to stay away from the thread. So I feel a bit taken aback that you're asking for a discussion to be silenced, because it's triggering for you.

I did not say the discussion to be silenced I said the NAMES of known serial killers should not be on this forum. What good is that?
I think I should stay away from this entire forum if this is what it's turned into.
Try growing up with serial rapists. Just sayin....
So presumptuous of you. You have no idea what I've been through . Just sayin...
 
@Notsowild When I first found this forum it set (my) triggers off too. Still does. It's very helpful in how we manage them. We don't know what each others triggers are. We can't shut this forum down. We can't shut the internet down. And we can't shut down life. Don't give up!
 
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