Bad experience with therapist - need opinions

@RainbowSearchParty
Yes, bad therapy is definetly worse than no therapy. I already experienced that in my life. But I still fear that I find no therapist at all for a very long time and I am suffering. Started pregabalin and I hope it helps. SSRI or neuroleptics don't work for me and Propranolol is only for use when needed, same as Lorazepam for extreme situations.

I wrote a mail for the therapist but still have to send it, translated with ChatGPT:

I would like to cancel the appointment on xx.xx and will not schedule any further appointments.

I would also like to provide some brief feedback regarding our last session: I found the conversation overall to be unhelpful. I am aware that the circumstances for the session were not ideal, but statements such as "You have failed" and "You take your feelings too seriously" are not respectful; rather, they are invalidating and demeaning in their effect. Given that I was in a vulnerable situation due to the sensitive topic, I was hoping for empathy and understanding.
I had experienced you differently during the previous sessions.

I now lack the necessary trust and security for a therapeutic collaboration.
 
I had a bad dream I can't tell anybody about so I write it down here.

The therapist let me down, I was on my own. Then the name that triggered me came into the room, I was in massive danger. I felt like a child and screamed for my mother but nobody came.

When I woke up it felt real and I was crying. I then understood why the experience with that therapist was so damaging.
 

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