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Can Dissociation Happen Unwillingly?

  • Post starter Post starter Thebodykeepsthescore
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Thebodykeepsthescore

Can dissociation happen un willingly?

For the last 2 years I've been suffering from a range of terrible symptoms after a very deep emotional break up,

This is how it feels - my cognition and perception has altered chronically for the last 2 years 24/7 - it happened one night about 3 weeks after my problems had ended, I felt a click in my head my body trembled and at the same time my perception alters (I felt strange and like u couldn't take anything in or process anything) 2 years on it feels as though my nervous system is super aroused I'm fine well about 40% how I use to feel lying down doing nothing but as soon as i get up my body or nerves can't handle it and i experience nerve pain in my spine head pain and my cognition shuts down, I haven't been myself since the night it happened to me and I don't use it volunterally like a coping mechanism I have no choice! See I can feel 90% but let's say I start trying to help someone or give advice or lift my heart rate or elevate my nervous arousal my body shuts down, starts off with Nerve pains in my back or spine then my head then my cognition starts to lower slowly until I mentally shut down I lose memory awareness and end up in a psychological mess. I struggle as I become stuck in this state. I can't function and experience some really horrible things mentally and physically. I know it's not me it's like I'm fighting my own nervous system!! I have had numerous tests all clear apart from abnormal blood flow in my frontal lobes.

At times it feels as if though my body has shut down to manual setting and I'm trying to function the best I can, at times it lifts a little and I can cognitively think better and more aware like I use to feel but again the slightest thing my brain and nervous system can't do it I shut down, this can be shopping day and if I don't stop and rest my body becomes weak I start to go pale cold sweats, total confusion and lack of cognition to the point of collapse to the floor, I've experienced stroke like episodes where I can't talk or move my legs just totally not with it like I've been put under water & pressure. High altitudes makes me worse and so does warm air. Feel suffocated.

It's the cognitive problems I can't deal with and the nerve pains feels like my nervous system is being deep fried or frazzled - I've been told of the only diagnosis is a dissocation disorder but reading about dissocation I can't relate to any of it. Possibly psychological issue? I don't know can anyone help me? Am I suffering a different form or ptsd or dissocation neurologically? xx
 
thoughts: maybe listen to what your nervous system is telling you and let it recuperate? To the degree you can?
Look into stellate ganglion blockade procedure.
Somatoform disorder?
Lots of b-vitamins, potassium-bearing foods may help.
Meditation may help.
Yoga by yourself might help.
Wondering if antiseizure/mood stabilizer meds would help?
 
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The thing is???
It's super-easy for doctors to blame medical problems on mental illness if you have a pre-existing mental illness...it's very tempting and convenient for the physician to pass tough problems to the psychiatrist.
Conversely, the psychiatrist will look at your baffling problems and tell you "That's a medical problem, you need a neurologist!" :arghh;:banghead:

Maybe a neuro-psychiatrist will not play this crap with you? Aha!

Also you might try acupuncture, massage, and psych therapy if you can afford to. Throw stuff at it, see what helps.
 
The vast majority of my disassociation is involuntary.

What you're describing doesn't sound like disassociation to me, it sounds like anxiety (nerves jangling, cold sweats, shaking, heart rate, can't think straight, brain fog/disassociation, can't talk) & fight/flight/freeze response / can't move.

There are a number of other things which cause those symptoms, but since you've been cleared medically for other known causes? Severe anxiety with a splash of disassociation is what it reads like to me.

Anxiety is a part of several different disorders (as well as it's own), including PTSD. It can range from very mild to completely crippling. When you say you've only been diagnosed with disassociation... Do you mean all by itself, or PTSD with Disassociation?
 
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The physical aspect of dissociation is called conversion disorder. I'm struggling to understand exactly what you are describing but shall just put that out there in case you haven't looked at that.

It would extremely rare for someone to choose dissociation and it usually happens unwillingly. Maybe read through others experiences and descriptions and see if anything resonates as words are hard to find when it comes to these things. People with anxiety disorders often have some depersonalisation/derealisation as part of their symptoms.

And example of an anxiety attack: Increased breathing and pulse rate; dizziness; trembling or shaking; pain in the chest head or neck etc; loosing feelings of limbs; fear one is going crazy or dying; feeling floating. spacy, numb or removed from oneself in some way; collapsing, vomiting or becoming unconscious.

Dissoocation has nothing to do with pain.

Loss of being able to use limbs can be both depersonalisation related or conversion related.
 
Stress also shuts down our thinking brain and cognitive functions and the animal sensory brain takes over. That happens a lot with both anxiety and depression.
 
I wanted to add one thing. Have a look at criterion A and see if you have experiences that fit from your past. Sometimes a recent experience can open up old wounds. It doesn't sound like your recent experience would fit so that can't cause PTSD.
 
Can dissociation happen un willingly?
Yes, in fact it is unwilling/involuntary.

At times it feels as if though my body has shut down to manual setting and I'm trying to function the best I can,

Could be depression, could be physical. Have you seen a doc, had all the blood work, thyroid tests, etc?

body becomes weak I start to go pale cold sweats

For me these are panic attack symptoms, but they can be symptoms of very many things. Best to see a doctor to go over possibilities and any relevant tests or assessments.

Feel suffocated.

This is pretty common with panic attacks, though I can't say that's what you're experiencing.

Am I suffering a different form or PTSD or dissocation neurologically?

We can't diagnose you here, sorry.
 
From what I understand, dissociation always start involuntarily. If it's chronic, and in the context of ongoing abuse, it can become somewhat voluntary, in that one can make the choice to step aside when terrible things are happening. But, atleast from my experience, once the decision is initiated, control is lost.

It sounds like what your experiencing feels awful. I hope you find answers. I agree with others, though, that this doesn't sound like the type of dissociation I've experienced.
 
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