Chaos

[shimmerz]

Seriously, I love you guys. Nobody has ever applied to the universe on my behalf EVER in my whole life (lives????). You made a difference today.

 

[scout86]

I'm back! (Sliding to a stop, accompanied by a cloud of dust, since WE are strangely lacking in snow.)

@shimmerz , remember awhile back when we were talking about "god"? God, as experienced by me, must LOVE Samuel Becket. (Waiting for Godot is one of my all time favorites!) When I was very little, I believed in God. The "kind old guy with the flowing beard" version. Then I looked around, saw the way the world actually seems to operate, and thought "God" was one of the nuttiest ideas I'd ever heard of. I walked away. I walked away for a LONG time. But I couldn't escape the feeling that there was more to this universe than the obvious. It was a long road to where I'm at now. Now I believe in a "God" who I admit is beyond my comprehension. I'm going on the assumption that, if he didn't think I'm "ok", I'd be different. I can get mad at him. Have, in fact. (I picture him thinking, "Oh, you guys are so CUTE when you get upset!")

So, in my version of "The Grand Master Plan Organizing the Universe". Everything isn't micro-managed, but sometimes, just to make a point, it can be pretty persistent. "No, that's NOT what I meant, keep looking!"

I have no idea if that's what's happening in your life right now or not.

From here, it clearly appears that you've been through a lot recently. Moved a long ways. Uprooted yourself. Took a big risk. Got horribly sick. Found out your SO had no guts. Moved back. Working on regrouping. All the while dealing with your history and you mental health with a fierce intensity and determination. That's A LOT! If you weren't feeling somewhat frazzled, you most likely wouldn't be feeling anything at all. I suspect "normal" people would AT LEAST be feeling frazzled.

There is a place, inside your head somewhere, that is meant to hold "peace". This is your excuse to find it. And, perhaps, The Universe cares SO MUCH, that it won't give you a break until you take one.

You are a human "being" not a human "doing",

I love @Recovery4Me 's thing about chaos preceding change! Awhile back, after some "events" in therapy, I remarked that there is a particular kind of chaos that I've come to appreciate, because it comes right before a light comes on. Maybe that's where you're at.

My mostly unsolicited advice? Begin by accepting that finding that place where peace is meant to dwell is important. Remember that if you chase it, it will run. You must be very still and very quiet and it will seek you. Breathe. It's extremely important. Take time to simply BE, that's important too. You are a child of the Universe shimmerz and the universe is the Perfect Parent. It loves it's children. Difficult as that is to imagine.

Want to know one reason I believe in "God"? Because I have no idea where this BS is coming from! LOL

(And now I sound like as much of a New Age wacko as my T usually does! :D)

 

[sun seeker]

It just came out, but if you read Elizabeth Gilbert's book Eat, Pray, Love, there is a part where she is going through a nasty divorce and her friend tells her to write out a petition to God

Sorry, rereading this I see it isn't clear. What I meant was my petition just came out. Elizabeth Gilbert's book has been around a few years. It's been made into a pretty good movie, too.

 

[Em C.]

When my world becomes chaotic I think "PLOT TWIST," and that amuses me enough that my head gets a bit clearer and I feel better. Because remember that you are the protagonist to your story so you have to win out, a few plot twists later :)

 

[Eleanor]

I remarked that there is a particular kind of chaos that I've come to appreciate, because it comes right before a light comes on. Maybe that's where you're at.

It is a well established principle in animal training that old well established skills and habits fall apart completely (and usually in the most inconvenient and infuriating way possible) right before the new learning gets assimilated and comes on line. It is not just you. It is dogs and horses too. Probably dolphins and anything else that learns stuff as well. So Scout might just be correct about this... :D

@Em C. "Plot Twist!" I love it. I will be using this!

 

[Hope4Now]

Application to Universe Or Whomsoever it May Concern,

Insofar as shimmerz has been doing her part above and beyond the call of duty in the interests of her own healing and wellbeing as well as for the support of those around her, I do hereby call your attention to this case and express my sincere hope that you will see fit to set right her recent run of bad luck, and correct this error forthwith by sending a greater amount of health, happiness, calm, prosperity, and other such things as are beneficial to her situation, at your earliest convenience.

Signed on this 9th day of February 2015,
Hope4Now

 

[scout86]

Application to Universe Or Whomsoever it May Concern,

Insofar as shimmerz has been doing her part above and beyond the call of duty in the interests of her own healing and wellbeing as well as for the support of those around her, I do hereby call your attention to this case and express my sincere hope that you will see fit to set right her recent run of bad luck, and correct this error forthwith by sending a greater amount of health, happiness, calm, prosperity, and other such things as are beneficial to her situation, at your earliest convenience.

ME TOO!

 

[shimmerz]

God/the Universe is apparently on strike. Car didn't start again. I will replace battery today. I will keep trying.

 

[Hope4Now]

I'm sending you and the car lots of energy. And because misery loves company (at least mine does so maybe yours will too), I'll share that since last night we've had water dripping through out ceilings and down the walls from massive ice dams...house alarm triggered early this am...nothing like a massive adrenaline rush to get one going with dog and kids freaking out. All are shoveling now...and here I go too. Space heaters attempting to melt the ice that froze the towels to the window sill. Hoping it stays cold here so we don't have full house flooding.

 

[scout86]

I was supposed to go to a meeting 2.5 hours away later today. Kind of an important meeting. There is a layer of ice on my windows (and everything else!). It seems to be turning to snow. I'm not sure that's an improvement. You know, I wouldn't mind the drive so much, if there weren't going to be a bunch of idiots on the road too, Am entertaining the thought that the universe might think I should skip the meeting. (OR it might be curious about whether or not I've gotten the "discretion is the better part of valor" memo yet.)

 

[Hope4Now]

@scout86 i don't know where you are, but after hearing horror stories from friends about getting to work yesterday and watching the highway pileups on the morning news, I'd say the universe is sending all of us the message to stay put. If you do opt to go, I wish you safe travels.

 

[scout86]

Minnesota. The meeting is in St Paul. IMO, the metro area is full of crazy people who don't know how to drive. I don't have to leave until this afternoon, but I'm leaning in the direction of a nice quiet evening at home with the dogs. (My new criteria is, if I'm scared to bring the dogs along because I'm afraid we might crash and they'd get hurt, I should probably stay home! :mad:)