Childhood Childhood Trauma Is Ruining My Life

[Cara]

Hi I'm Cara, I'm new so please forgive me if I do something wrong or something.

My story is when I was 10 years old, I caught silent pneumonia, and my lung collapsed. Since then my fear of hospitals is ruining my life, I can't say the common word for IV that starts with 'D' and don't let ANYONE under any circumstances touch the back of my hand. I'm 18 now so it's recent for me- my problem is I have high functioning Aspergers so I can't let things go, and it's just getting worse, I think about it all the time.

Last year I had a blood clot in my lung- so you can imagine my absolute horror but I was so in shock I didn't register the feelings for like a month afterwards, I think about that all the time too, and the thing in my arm- that's my biggest trigger. I don't know what I can do, my psychiatrist says I've got of the scale anxiety and has given my tablets to deal with that, they are currently changing my antidepressants so they are looking after me. But I don't know how to deal with this, it has ruined my life, it's taken my childhood way, my adolescence, it's it's taking away my mind. It even got me put in a mental hospital when I was 12- if anyone has any ideas how I can cope, or deal with this that would be brilliant.

I just want this nightmare to be over.

Thanks

 

[jenneigh]

Hi I'm Cara, I'm new so please forgive me if I do something wrong or something.
My story is when I was...

I'm so sorry you are going through that. I have Aspergers too, so I can relate to the not being able to let things go. I hope this website is helpful to you : )

 

[lisa lorraine h]

hi cara, what help me to deal with problems stemming from my childhood was understanding that as a child your brain is developing and these fears from these traumatic incidents shape your understanding of the world. certain neurons connecting to related neurons (thoughts) that create complex patterns, patterns that are malleable depending on lessons you learn from experience and understanding. Accepting the fact that all though it appears irrational to others it isn't to you because of your unique experience, there is no need to see this fear as an enemy, you are in the right to feel the way that you do. Just accepting this and coming to terms with it will help you feel a lot better about everything and possibly gradually create new brain patterns that doesn't result in you losing your mind.

i dont know if this makes any sense but its advice i give to me. i hope this helps x