Christians Unite!

Mach123

MyPTSD Pro
We just started with an online bible teacher (pastor) at Calvary Baptist in Burbank CA. It's expository teaching. Heavy on the Old Testament Jewish context. "What would the Jewish audience have thought about what he just said"? My son met this guy and sat under him awhile.

My thing is the legalism is so dreadful and it starts right away. It's almost like they say you have to be feeling bad because you aren't good enough on the one hand but God forgives you on the other. I could go on and on about this forever but it's boring.

They (some people) like to call my position "easy believeism" it's all I can do though? I think there are biblical and practical reasons it's ok? I don't think it's outside the pale of orthodoxy and it's what it is. I can't do anything about it but pray which I do sometimes.

Point is I wanna be in church and study with my wife but I don't wanna fight about what I believe with anyone. I love the teaching.
 

Mach123

MyPTSD Pro
Trying to deal with this for me is always such a giant mind (expletive) Christians don't swear lol. I always come back to non violence which in my trauma induced state has always been really hard to get my mind around. I remember feeling like I'm not tough enough to embrace non violence. That's just struggling to talk about it though. He (our new online pastor) has been dealing with it in the sermons. 1st Peter is a very hard book (on the flesh because the flesh doesn't want to listen.) : )
 

VioletButterfly

MyPTSD Pro
I always feel safe inside of this thread. Safe in God's hands and in His heart. I've been suffering a great deal in the World and inside of myself. I've sensed messages and support, but my strongholds, pain, and fear have been shutting out a great deal of what would be helpful and healing. Today, I did a bit of writing to try to reorient myself to reality, such as it is, and the concepts of God's love and plan.

 

VioletButterfly

MyPTSD Pro
It's been a rough day. I'm feeling very, very fatigued from the flu. It seems to be the last vestiges of it that I'm experiencing, but I feel like I have Mono. The fatigue and brainfog are incredible. Needing to secure housing and find a job as well. Plus, packing in the next 2 weeks. So, well, ugh! I'm feeling His presence around me and in me though. Feeling so very blessed and supported no mater how things turn out. Saying prayers of gratitude and thanksgiving.
 

VioletButterfly

MyPTSD Pro
Thank you @Justmehere .

I heard a song today about overcoming by Jeremy Camp while I was out and about. It reminded me of a song by Mandisa about overcoming what confronts us in life. I have a memory of dancing to this while I was in the handicap stall in the ladies room of my church. Hey, well.... it was on the overhead music speaker and I was in the God's house, so well..... dance away I did. God is still speaking to me, and I'm still listening and hearing Him. I am a child of God and I am STRONG in His love and grace. Onward!

 

VioletButterfly

MyPTSD Pro
I heard this the other day when I was horribly distraught, feeling lost and unhinged, and at the end of my understanding and rope. A very complicated day and God kept me encouraged through music. His doing, not mine. I was done. It is a mystery to me. I should have been dead several times by now. Must be a reason or purpose yet for me to serve.

 
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