Constant Lies Out Of Fear

[mamachick]

I am a believer that the truth sets us free-but not in a case where the truth could cause you to be harmed.

You are obviously feeling really bad about loosing yourself and your identity in lies. You are not feeling safe and are living in fear. You do not have anyone to disclose the root of your fear and troubles to. Mental health treatment is not utilized because of fear of disclosure.

Change requires change. I am all for being hopeful. I am also a fan of reality. How are you going to manage ptsd without a major change? Such as moving, getting counseling, addressing fear issues, working toward having a peaceful environment.

You can be somewhere else and be haunted by nightmares. I am safe where I am and have nightmares at times. So moving would not help those nightmares. If I had a former abuser that would kill me if they recognized me, I would seriously be considering a move. It is not cowardly-it is smart. I understand issues of family-we have the benefit of living in a society where communication is readily available and we can talk with family from almost anywhere. The dept of human service gives cell phones to food stamp recipients with a couple of hours per month pre paid.
Okradlak, no disrespect but I dont understand doing the same and expecting a different result.

Grama-I agree about not running most of the time, and it sounds that you got some great help and someone to help you to address how to talk to others as well. I am very glad for you.

 

[OKRADLAK]

Yes, you are right. I do need to move. Ironically I do not feel that I will be killed NOW because it all came out. However, the terror in the brain just goes on and on. So it is irrational fear, I guess. But you are right, I need to get the hell out of here. I have been really considering it.

 

[mamachick]

I know the irrational fear can take over-I have been there. Im sorry you are dealing with so much. If it is irrational, therapy can help but it does take a leap of faith to trust in therapy and the therapist. I hope you can do that somewhere soon. I dont like having ptsd but it only started getting better after I began therapy and began identifying what was irrational and what was realistic.