DID Creating another "part"

[lostforgottensoul]

I dont have DID and dont really "split" in therapy but my therapist has advised many times that its like he is speaking to an adult and a child at the same time. I do have an "inner child" that I can feel. Its haulted emotions, per my therapist.

Im amazed I came out of my trauma without DID!

In my trauma, I did make up "alter-like" people, they had names at the time and it was to say "this person went through this, I didnt" and there was a particular punishment that I dont remember the act of. I remember getting ready for it, knowing what was coming but id be gone during and the next memory picks up after in my room where they'd put me after. So if i "split" I dont know but I doubt it, I think I was just that far into disassociation to loose memory. Ive done that twice as an adult.

But because of the above, Im very removed from my past. I talk very flat affect about it, very emotion-less about it, i feel nothing about it, and my therapist advised its due to making up these "alter-like" people in my trauma.

I dropped the names after I finally left the trauma.

I do hear a crowded lunchroom noise that gets louder and louder until I want to pull off my head. Its that and the flat affect, orginally, that made me think schizophrenia but it doesnt fit plus my therapist said those with schizophrenia have flat affect with everything they say, and I dont. And I dont hear words. It stopped on its own but it has made an apperence again.

In any case, you are no where alone in anything that you go through! I learned that as there are several "special challenges" that I have due to my trauma but I learned that I also am not alone in them! :hug:

 

[trying2movefwd]

@lostforgottensoul I was a lot like that over a year ago. Then worked through some of the trauma after flashbacks intensefied and now I am an emotional basket case!!! Emotional regulation is what I need now. One extreme to the next. :confused:

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Emotional regulation is what I need now. One extreme to the next.

DBT is great for that, and seriquel xr, for me, helped a ton but I know you had issues with it. Is Abilify helping, I think thats what you said you went to if im remembering right?

 

[trying2movefwd]

I think Abilify is helping mentally. But I want to give it another couple weeks to see for sure.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Well thats good that Abilify is helping huh?

I know its an anti-psycotic like Seriquel is but it didnt work for me and Seriquel XR is sort of 'cooling down' extreme intense emotions and making them less extreme and intense.

 

[7Cs]

I just found this post. I'm so glad you found something that is (likely) helping. I was getting worried about you as I read this.

I want you to know that I can relate. One thing I've learned in my journey through PTSD is that when the dark times come there is always light on the other side... you just have to find your way to it. No matter how many times you find yourself in that dark place, never give up. Always remember that eventually the light will come back.