Relationship Dating A Vet And Need Advice

[Cavegirl]

It's so comforting reading other stories.

I was just on websites last night for "typical" relationship advice. I wanted to know why my Marine texts me back with just a few word responses and questions. They all said he wasn't interested.

We aren't "together" but I know he likes talking to me, even if we are just friends. But we hang out for hours and hours at a time regularly and he cooks me dinner etc. and we are sexual together. Essentially we are acting like we are dating but not having the title.

I don't expect him to magically decide to be with me someday. I'm just accepting the level of relationship he's capable of giving me. And trying my best to be ok with it. I don't feel like he's just using me for sex which is what all my friends tell me. We hang out for like 8 hours a visit and sex is in there but I don't leave after, we continue to hang out. I don't know, maybe I'm being a fool.

 

[queen]

@Cavegirl , I don't think you're being a fool. It sounds identical to how I spend my time with my vet. There are times when we will spend the whole weekend together hanging out, or he'll want to see me or have me come over 2-3 nights in a row. Sure, we have sex during that time, but the rest of the time we're hanging out having fun. He's more of a homebody, so we watch movies or play video games. Last weekend he actually took me out to dinner which is not common for him, but it was so much fun.

I used to talk to my friends a lot more about him, and their responses are like other friends' responses... "He's playing you" or "He's not really interested", or "Are you really gonna wait around for him to figure out what he wants?" He's said to me that he doesn't just want to be FWB, he doesn't want out "relationship" to be emotion-less, but he also doesn't know what exactly that entails. Even when I brought up our "status" the other day, he got super uncomfortable. But if I were to tell my friends that, they'd jump all over it and convince me to get rid of him.

Now I only really talk to one of my friends about him, and she tries to be supportive by saying "I'm happy if you're happy, but I worry that he's not meeting your needs." Which is fair, because sometimes he isn't. But I am trying to do what you're doing as well, accepting him for who he is, accepting where we're at, and trying to be hopeful because I do see him making efforts with me.

I think this is why that relationship label "It's Complicated" was created.... :roflmao:;):hilarious: