ILoveLife
VIP Member
I wanted to quit therapy with this T and was blaming myself. Talked to a friend that has his head on his shoulders, and he helped me see that she's not helping my recovery at all.
First, she has a problem with me being bisexual. She diverts the conversation every time I brush the subject of my inability to form solid relationships, focuses solely on men, or makes this weird expression that I can't read when I talk about women. Once she even told me a healthy child (any future children I might have) needs a mother and a father present.
She also gives too many advices. She keeps telling me I need to be angry, for example. I was angry ever since I have memory of myself, up until I figured I needed some peace of mind. I don't need to be angry anymore, my life is going pretty well all things considered.
She's very conservative, which I respected all this time, but her inability to respect my own opinions over what my life should be like breaches boundaries that should be firmly in place in any therapy room. I think there's room for different points of view in life, and she shouldn't be forcing hers on me.
Then, there's that whole thing of my family. Once my childhood abuser (father) died, there was a lot of "I want to forget" without anyone being able to forgive each other. I was and am ready to heal those dynamics when it comes to my participation, I went no contact with my older sister because she is really uncaring, but I don't need to go no contact with my other sister that helped me a lot during my most difficult times, right? Or my mother, that dispite all her mistakes, is helping me currently. What I should do is step up my responsibility of these relationships going to crap, not turn my back and solely blame them. I'm not my father, not even close, so I can act differently.
Self care and self appreciation are important, I don't want to destroy all the hard work so far in building my new life.
I found a good instutite that helps trauma and addiction, after resting for a while and getting all my affairs in order, I'm going to apply for therapy there.
First, she has a problem with me being bisexual. She diverts the conversation every time I brush the subject of my inability to form solid relationships, focuses solely on men, or makes this weird expression that I can't read when I talk about women. Once she even told me a healthy child (any future children I might have) needs a mother and a father present.
She also gives too many advices. She keeps telling me I need to be angry, for example. I was angry ever since I have memory of myself, up until I figured I needed some peace of mind. I don't need to be angry anymore, my life is going pretty well all things considered.
She's very conservative, which I respected all this time, but her inability to respect my own opinions over what my life should be like breaches boundaries that should be firmly in place in any therapy room. I think there's room for different points of view in life, and she shouldn't be forcing hers on me.
Then, there's that whole thing of my family. Once my childhood abuser (father) died, there was a lot of "I want to forget" without anyone being able to forgive each other. I was and am ready to heal those dynamics when it comes to my participation, I went no contact with my older sister because she is really uncaring, but I don't need to go no contact with my other sister that helped me a lot during my most difficult times, right? Or my mother, that dispite all her mistakes, is helping me currently. What I should do is step up my responsibility of these relationships going to crap, not turn my back and solely blame them. I'm not my father, not even close, so I can act differently.
Self care and self appreciation are important, I don't want to destroy all the hard work so far in building my new life.
I found a good instutite that helps trauma and addiction, after resting for a while and getting all my affairs in order, I'm going to apply for therapy there.
