First of all thank you for your responses...
gamereign555:
It is possible that the doctor placed me on Depakote for that very reason. I stopped sleeping this past August because of some events that triggered me. Over the past ten years I have become very aware that sleep = many few PTSD symptoms. As the weeks went on getting 4-6 hours of sleep (I know for some of us that is a lot, but for me I need 7.5-10 hours to function) I began to slide. I tried everything from exercise, to progressive muscle relaxation 3 times a day, to eating perfectly, to trying 5-HTP and also Melatonin, I listened to white noise, I listened to sleep hypnosis tapes, in my opinion I tried nearly everything and it just got worse and worse. Sleep became something that I obsessed over all the time, I felt that without sleep my life was in trouble. By about mid November my life was a mess. Issues with my girlfriend began to escalate. I was having major problems with intrusive thoughts, major problems with trust (in an obsessive way), major problems regulating my emotions, major problems feeling numb (well feeling anger, but not love), acting more impulsive, and more and more depressed each day (feeling like I was not in control). I became very controling to the people around me, not because I wanted to be mean or let them get on with their own lives, but because I was terrified and I wanted them to stop triggering me (and pretty much everything that people did triggered me). I became very obsessive, very keyed up in everything I did. So possibly that is why I was given the Depakote??? I am only 8 days into taking it, but it does seem that my obsessive behavior has decreased slightly.
As for the Seroquel if nothing else I have been sleeping. I hadn't slept 8 hours since about mid August and since Wednesday I have slept between 9-10 hours each night. I do feel that this is important for making up the massive sleep debt that has accumulated. I am hopefully that if I continue to sleep this way for at least the next few weeks that in its own right will make me feel much better.
Srain:
I do understand what you are talking about with checking up on the medications. When I first developed PTSD I was 19 years old (10 years ago). I knew something was majorly wrong with me, didn't have a clue at the time what it was. I was attending Oregon State University and I went to the Health Center and they gave me Paxil (started me out on way too high of a dose, plus I was a teenager). I started seeing things, hearing buzzing noises, and I felt like I could be homicidal (to say the least my first experience with a drug for the brain was not a pleasant one). I ended up being hospitalized.
Over the years I have been on Paxil, Celexa, Effector, Zoloft, and Wellbutrin. Some of them helping in some ways (I think taking away some of my depression and some of my obsessive compulsive tendencies), while in other ways making me much worse.
I have been completely free of medication for two years until this past week. The funny thing is that besides the past few months it was the best period of time in my PTSD life that I have experienced. This past week I checked myself into the hospital because I had tried all of the coping techniques I have learned over the years and I kept sliding down the slope, I just couldn't stabilize myself. I hate drugs, but I realized that every time in the past that I began to slip I was put on some SSRI or something else that helped me pull through. I saw that if I didn't get help now that I might not be around in the next 4 to 5 months (I felt like I was losing my mind). :(
I am aware of the crappy side effects of the two drugs. :( I am looking for a new phys doctor, the guy who prescribed me the medication works in the mental health ward of the hospital I checked myself into, so I need to find a follow up appointment. I am attempting to find a doctor who has a background treating PTSD and trauma disorders, but unfortunately I lost my job because of my breakdown and northern Nevada in general has fairly crappy mental health. I just have to keep trying to do my best!
AngelaMarie:
Also thank you for your post. Yes, Depakote is manly used for seizures and bi-polar disorder. I did finally find a few studies that indicate it can be helpful to some people with PTSD. As for me it is still way to early on and we will have to wait and see.
The Seroquel really knocked me out the first few days, but the last couple I feel much better and much more awake in the day time. A big problem is that the stuff costs me $200 even with my insurance. That really sucks... and at that rate I will not be able to afford it very much longer. As for crappy withdrawal, that is one of my least favorite experiences in the world. A few years ago when I just graduated college and I didn't have a job yet I was taking 150 mg of Zoloft. I had no health insurance and didn't have a docotor because I had always used the student health center for any of my health needs in college. I ended up stopping 150 mg of Zoloft cold turkey. Talk about brain zaps, high fevers, emotional swings, depression that lasted about 12 weeks. Not a pleasant experience. But after the 12 weeks things seemed to clear up and I was able to feel very good for a few years. But yes, withdrawal of these medications scares the crap out of me!
Thank you everyone for your posts...
If any other people want to post on here I think it would be helpful! There just isn't a lot of info about Depakote and PTSD out there (or on this site either). As time progresses I will post more about my own experiences with Depakote!
