Disassociation event while driving

[recoveringfromptsd]

Tonight while driving home after dropping off my nephew. I went into that nether-work of disassociation while thinking about past trauma, while it was short as I was pulled out of it by the running partly off the road it happened.

I am afraid to tell my therapist, as I may lose my driving privileges. And that would be a life wrecker in my current circumstance.

I also had a sort of not quite a panic attack on our way back for I dropped my nephew off.

I know the dangers this posses not just to myself but to others on the road. But if I can't drive, I can can't function as everything is a 4 to 10 mile walk. Of which I no longer can physically do, and there are no other transportation options as those are reserved for non-medicare medicaid only people.

 

[Powder]

If that's a one time event, it should be okay.

You can take an ice cold water in an insulated cup and use the AC or roll down the window to treat dissociation.

 

[Sideways]

while it was short as I was pulled out of it by the running partly off the road it happened.

It doesn’t strike me that one dissociation episode is likely to result in losing your license. It may depend on the laws in your region, but dissociation oftentimes isn’t treated the same as conditions like unmanaged epilepsy.

The problem with not talking to your T about this, is your T can’t help you make sure it never happens again.

A lot of people (possibly most?) spend at least the occasional trip driving mildly dissociated, on auto-pilot. So it’s not the case that in order to drive safely, you have to stop dissociating altogether.

But I think it’s important to acknowledge that this was a serious episode, and it really does require addressing. You are no doubt well aware that there could have been a small child on the side of the road that could’ve been hit and catastrophically injured, or worse, when you drove off the road. That’s not something you can afford to sweep under the carpet.

Address it with your T. Ask to come up with a plan as to:
(1) how do we make sure you’re not dissociated when you get into the car
(2) what short term things you can do to prevent dissociating once you’ve started driving; and
(3) what can we do long term to reduce the issue of your dissociation levels.

Writing out exactly what was happening for you on the day of the incident might help, because it might give clues about things that might have upped your stress levels before you even got into the car, possible triggers that may have occurred before you got into the car, and thus situations where you may need to address your stress levels before getting behind the wheel in the future.

I don’t think the answer is as easy as “How can I stop myself dissociating while I’m driving”. If it’s not common for you to dissociate like this while driving, then something has changed to make your life more stressful, and your usual resilience to dissociating at high risk times has reduced. You can pull that apart with your T and fix it up so that you’re safe again. But only if you address it.

There’s no guarantee this won’t ever happen again if you don’t address it with your T. And there’s no guarantee that you (and others) will be just as lucky if it does happen again. The fix isn’t necessarily going to be complicated, or even necessary take a long time. But the potential consequences of not addressing will be lifelong if you or someone else ends up injured.

 

[EveHarrington]

In the USA that’s not enough to lose your license.

 

[recoveringfromptsd]

@Muse No it's happened before just not this close, my housemate in the worse times rides with me and talks to me to keep me in the moment.

@EveHarrington & @Sideways I told my my therapist, and we did talk about it, it's a long term problem that may never go away. She is considering trying to get me a PTSD/BIPOLAR service dog. But that takes years.

 

[Powder]

Try canine companion. It takes about a year.

 

[Lucycat]

But if I can't drive, I can can't function as everything is a 4 to 10 mile walk

What would you do if you broke your leg tomorrow? Somehow, you would manage - although it might be very complicated.

However I do agree with others. Even people without PTSD are known to dissociate when driving. Frequently people get behind the wheel and then suddenly realise they have reached their destination with no recollection of the journey.

But having started to leave the road, you 'came to'. This bodes well. Good luck!

 

[somerandomguy]

I drove from Western Pennsylvania to Washington DC while in a dissociative state once. Even worse, I had a passenger. I don't recommend it, but somehow I was able to do it. But I will not do it again. Maybe the part of me that was driving was still aware. So it's not an impossible problem for everyone.

 

[recoveringfromptsd]

I tend to have spells that last about 20 minutes, even observed in a hospital setting. I have gone past exits on highway (how did I get this far?) and my housemate has observed it, she says I go to slow when I go into this state.

I recently ran off the road on a bypass because it had a vere left. I lost my license decades ago for similar causes.