Childhood Do Most Parents Tell Their Kids They Love Them?

[sedna]

Ok :oops: I think there's something wrong with me then.

Wth?

no there is nothing wrong with you.

 

[Fadeaway]

I'm in my 50's and often tell my kids I love them, My Father was from a different generation and never hugged or kissed us kids, My mum always did, I had a normal upbringing and feel like I was loved.

That confuses me. The lack of physical affection made me feel very unloved. Maybe your mom balanced it out? I guess you could say my grandparents were from another generation as well. Because my mom was older when she had me there was a huge age gap between my grandparents and myself.

Anonymous, you probably feel love but don't recognize it for what it is.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Never remember my mom stating those words towards me. Ever. She didn't love me. She despised me for living and the baby she lost not living.

I said it to her once and her reply was "you don't know what love is."

My dad never said it when I was a child but says it today and it feels super weird. I say it back but still feels super weird. For a long time when he said it I just said "ok". Lol. It took me forever to say it back and be simi ok to hear it.

If i had a child I would make damn sure those were the first they heard in the morning and the last they heard from me every time they walked away from me.

Love is much more than words. If I had children, I would also make damn sure I showed them I loved them in every way shape and form so they never ever doubted if I loved them or not.

 

[Ronin]

I told mine whenever I could.

As to my childhood, that was a mix of twisted 'love' & hate speech / acts.

Other parental figures in my life, the ones worth something usually shown it by being there for me & mine when needed. Bullshit out time, pure love. :D

 

[F_uckYourselves]

My parents did, but they were also verbally and emotionally abusive, so ...

In contrast, I remember we once hosted a French exchange student who expressed shock when she heard my mother and I saying "I love you" to each other, and by her account she had a way better relationship with her mother than I did with mine. So I think it might also be a cultural thing.

 

[gealach]

I don't remember hearing it from my parents, and definitely not from my sibling. There were also no hugs or anything. We were just 4 people who lived in the same house for about 18 (dysfunctional, abusive) years. We didn't even like each other, certainly didn't love each other.

My mom has said, more than once, if she could have a do-over she wouldn't marry or have kids. I haven't heard from my dad in 10? 13? years. "Sibling'' I cut off 13 years ago, probably dead for all I know.

I saw the way my friends' parents treated them growing up, and knew my friends were loved. I knew that was how it was supposed to be. Some of them treated me better than my own family did.

 

[shimmerz]

Nope. It wasn't said to me. More importantly, it wasn't felt by me.

On the other hand, I don't recall my grandpa saying 'I love you', but goddammit I knew he did. I felt it through every cell in my body. It was in the sparkle of his beautiful blue eyes, it was in his wanting to spend time with me, it was in the fig newtons he left in the cupboard for me to find, it was in his brilliant smile when I walked in the door after school.

There wasn't a doubt in my 2-10 year old mind that he loved me purely. Just for being me. And that short period of love that I experienced through him has given me a basis for what I deserve in life and how that feels.

Thank you grandpa. I hope you knew I loved you too.

 

[8888]

I have a good relationship with my parents and they often tell me they love me.

 

[JennaJenn]

My parents barely never tell me they love me. But I know my mom does because she shows it every way she can. Sometimes when I was little I asked her if she loved me and she always told me to not to ask silly questions.
My dad..well that's a different story.
Edit: I make sure I tell my younger brother that I love him every time Im with him. I dont want him to ever doubt he is loved.

 

[mama13]

I'm in my thirties now, I tell my daughter I love her regularly, and vice versa.

My parents never said th...

My mother is English and my father Irish, not sure if that has much to do with it; however, they were not affectionate at all. I happened to seek a spouse who is completely opposite and displays affection for me and our children all the time. I have learned to not be so guarded as I was at first in relationships. When my children came along, it was an instant understanding of unconditional, unabashed, unwavering love...I say it to them almost daily, in the morning, when they leave for school, and in the evening. It has almost become like a greeting...a hug and an I love you sweetheart. I feel like I needed that as a kid. Such a simple way to show your emotional support for the little beings you have decided to bring into the world. It's a like a little force field of protection. (((And, I do discipline them as well so they understand the difference between right and wrong behavior as well.)))