Sexual Assault Do you ever feel lust for your molester or rapist later on?

[hithere]

I'm only making a guess, but the voices you hear telling you to do these things could be a type of flash back or memory. The mind is trying to work the whole thing out.

 

[anonymous]

I told my counselor I looked up stockholm syndrome and that it didn't apply to me, and all he said was...

Maybe it is time for a new therapist?

 

[anonymous]

I'm only making a guess, but the voices you hear telling you to do these things could be a type of flas...

Yes, that makes sense. Others have suggested it or similar things too.

 

[User88]

Yes, I do. It’s really difficult because I can’t even talk to anyone about this aspect as I feel like nobody would understand.

 

[Swift]

In a word, yes.
I try not to think about it too much because it's a hell of a rabbit hole and makes me disgusted with myself.

 

[Qwerty2424]

Yes it was as a child but as I got older into teenage years the feelings of budding sexuality were really hard to deal with and the only person who had touched me in that way was my abuser so that was what my sexual feelings revolved around if he had been around I probably would have gone back to him. It felt like a compulsion to do so. I talk about it now and view it like looking from the outside in or maybe just an intellectual viewpoint not really any emotion attached.

 

[User88]

I have to really resist the urge to meet up with him. It’s so bizarre because after it happened, I just wanted to get away from him and never see him again, but later down the line, I get the urge to see him. I know I’ll be putting myself in danger if I go to his flat again so I guess I just have to remember that.

 

[hymnless]

I have a very hard time with this as well. Moreso that when I’m having sex, I often have flashbacks to one of my abusers because that’s where I learned pleasure from. I don’t even know if flashback is the right word because it’s not scary at all until I start to think about it. So not necessarily lust per se, but still something that feels good in that moment. f*ck it feels so gross to say that.