Do you push yourself through a trigger or let it get better as you are getting better?

[SeekingAfrica]

Recently I've been slowly getting better and some of the things I was not able to do for a long time have slowly been melting away/improving. However, I have a busy week, and although I can do my work at whichever point of the day I want, I feel better if it's done earlier. So for 2 nights I've been trying to start waking up couple of hours earlier than usual. And I even tried starting a night routine and going to bed early enough to still have enough hours of sleep.

But historically early mornings have been super stressful and triggering for me. There are only several times in my life in which I've managed early mornings if I didn't absolutely need to, and I always had a good morning routine. I have morning routine now as well...but nevertheless since I started setting my alarm for these couple hours earlier than my usual wake up, I keep sleeping badly and waking up in such panic that it takes me extra several hours to get functional. Yesterday I tried doing my morning routine and burst in tears during my 15min yoga session. Today I woke up so frozen in panic that for a while after breakfast I couldn't move. Finally I went down to the store to get coffee and to make myself move for a bit, and I literally had to take breaks while getting dressed. I know that waking earlier is stressful for me, I just wonder if it will get better in time or if I should take a step back and start waking earlier in chunks over time, not 2h all at once.

I'm kind of disappointed. Waking more easily and flowing through my routine felt like a step forward and now it feels like I've taken few steps back. I'm trying to decide how to approach it still.

 

[Friday]

As a general rule of thumb... triggers I push through, stressors I don’t.

I still handle each of them, but I come at them differently.

- Triggers I deliberately come at, chipping away at them, flirting around the edges of them, pushing the boundaries of them, eliminating them as triggers until they can be in my daily life no worries.

- Stressors are much bigger and broader. (Some classic examples are all men or all women, following sexual assault. Or all cars, following a motor vehicle accident.) Some personal examples of my own are times of day, or being cold. They stress me the f*ck out, and my symptoms start ramping up, so the end effect is much the same. But the best traction I’ve found with these isn’t deliberately bringing small pieces of these into my life until they no longer provoke the action, but working around them, and bleeding stress like crazy. The more I lower my stress levels? The smaller a Reaction gets provoked. The more often I have a lowered reaction? The more often I can have these things in my life, and the less stress they invoke.

It’s kind of a reverse process.

Triggers hit me exactly the same regardless of what my stress levels are.
Stressors hit me very differently depending on what my stress levels are.

So when I have stressors in my life? I deal with them by lowering my stress levels as much as possible.

 

[EveHarrington]

I’d move my wake up time gradually given that such a huge shift is causing such disruption.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

@Friday Interesting explanation! I guess under that definition waking up early falls under that definition is more of a stressor. However more stressful periods can benefit from me waking earlier and not rushing :/. Waking up later as I have been produces extra stress, so I am not sure how I will moderate that, lower it. I guess I'll have to go with the usual basic advices on lowering stress and hope it works. Plus for several weeks when my stress was lower I was naturally getting up earlier and I feel sort of disappointed to have taken such a step back.

@EveHarrington That maybe a good idea... I'll do my best to try it.

 

[ms spock]

I am having the same problem at the moment. I am waking really early and I am only get 6 hours worth of sleep and I am waking at 3am so going to bed much earlier.

Have you tried Self Compassion (aka Kristin Neff?), David Burn's "Feeling Good" and there is another good one which I am reading at the moment.

Things that triggered me to the point of suicidal ideation I had to work at sideways, little bit by little.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

I am having the same problem at the moment. I am waking really early and I am only get 6 hours worth of sleep and I am waking at 3am so going to bed much earlier.

Have you tried Self Compassion (aka Kristin Neff?), David Burn's "Feeling Good" and there is another good one which I am reading at the moment.

Things that triggered me to the point of suicidal ideation I had to work at sideways, little bit by little.

I want to wake really early, but because it stresses me out I end up turning off 3 alarms in a row...then I don't have enough time for yoga and my usual morning routine, and I end up starting work already stressed.

I can imagine waking at 3am would be hard, for me that would be time for going to sleep(well, once upon a time, I try to be in bed ay lot earlier now). I have heard about Self compassion and David Burns but never got around to either of these. I'll try to find time.

I totally get what you mean, I feel very deeply and I do feel very bleak when I start my days the way I have lately. I'll try to find ways to chip away at it, try all I know and the stuff recommended here, and see what may work.

 

[Ronin]

Triggers, I tend to push myself through.

Sleep is not one of those.
Sleep alterations are super guaranteed to throw me into a different mindset, and I cannot afford to lose skills / awareness who is who in my life / orientation in my thoughts and what is valid for the now, instead of then.

 

[Hopefulphoenix]

Can I get a clarification on a really interesting topic. What is the difference between a stressor and a trigger??

 

[Friday]

@Hopefulphoenix >>> Stressor vs. Trigger - What Is A Trigger?