Poll Do You Struggle With Compliments?

[Justmehere]

Sometimes a genuine compliment can trigger can stress me out and trigger anxiety. Sometimes I can't easily identify what the anxiety is about, other then somebody gave me a complement and that triggered anxiety. I have a friend who says I literally physically back up when people compliment me.

My therapist said it's related to trauma and PTSD.

 

[Intrepid]

I don't really know what the anxiety is about either. It's almost like the compliment will short circuit all my defenses. If I believe a compliment I'm vulnerable.

 

[Friday]

Nope! I don't struggle at all. Compliments sting, so I avoid &/or ignore them. ;)

 

[ladee]

Yes, I struggle internally. I do accept the compliment, and try to be sincere with my thank you's. But I do struggle internally , I don't get anxious, just start contemplating... asking myself questions.. like, what do they see that i don't.. that type of thing...
And it depends on who is complimenting.. if I feel someone is just shinin' me on, it's a simple thank you. No feelings attached..If it's some one I care about, I do a little mental zig zag, and have to process what I am feeling. I take it as someone 'investing' in me. And that should always be acknowledged on my part, regardless of how it makes me feel. Others feel rejection, just like we do. They may be taking a risk them selves by complimenting... two way street.

 

[claroscuro]

Compliments do the same for me. In addition to triggering anxiety, it also tweaks my trust issues and leaves me wondering what the giver wants from me, which then leads to fear. Which, you know, is totally awesome. :facepalm:

This definitely stems from trauma for me.

 

[FauxLiz]

When someone compliments me I automatically look around to see if they meant it for someone else. If they really are just speaking to me I question what they want from me.because I have had that as the standard MO from abusers in the past they would compliment me make me feel good about something and then all of a sudden they are telling me that I have screwed something up, or they desperately need me to do this huge costly favor for them that I can't say no to or worse if the compliment comes from a man that is older than I or in a peer or authority figure to me I freak out because I question when he is going to attack me, when is he going to show me his real side.

Complements totally freak with my head and people think I am crazy because I freeze, blush beet read and can't speak.

 

[Broken Dahlia]

Sometimes a genuine compliment can trigger can stress me out and trigger anxiety. Sometimes I can't...

Compliments freak me out, too. I used to apologize when someone complimented me, still don't understand that one. Now I just get suspicious and wonder what they want. This has bothered me since childhood-I think it scares me when someone is paying attention, then I wonder what else they've noticed about me.

 

[Tinyflame]

No they don't freak me out, but I consider them more a reflection of the person saying them (having a good heart), or just they're ~a little crazy, lol. Or they just don't realize. Mostly I forget what they've said pretty quickly, couldn't remember if I wanted to.

 

[Deleted member 34424]

No, I don't have problems with compliments, though sometimes from my mom or dad (whenever I even talk to my dad, that's the thing). My mom the most, but that's from our... interesting relationship.

 

[joeylittle]

If I'm mentally pretty together, then only on the inside. It's a little like, oh, excruciating.

If I'm caught off guard or having a tough time, I physically flinch if someone says anything complimentary towards me. I know where it comes from, but it's definitely still something I'm working on. I'm honestly not sure if it will ever go away, at this point. But, keep trying anyway.

 

[KeepingTime]

I used to apologize when someone complimented me,

Me too! Would do it without realizing it and it would draw some really strange reactions.

then I wonder what else they've noticed about me.

Absolutely

That's after I've convinced myself that they must be mistaken...have the wrong person, or just have been completely fooled by my fake front.

 

[Alimaria]

I am in constant conflict between wanting the compliment and avoiding it. I "need" the approval, but if I get it, I feel undeserving. It's a sick mental cycle for me.