Do You Think You Have A Specific Purpose In Life....

[helena]

I’m interested to know how many people believe they exist for a specific purpose rather than simply be here to experience and survive life.

If you do believe you have a purpose (a higher self type purpose) what led you to realise that and what steps have you taken to fulfil your destiny.

If you don’t believe anyone has a purpose and believe that we are all simply random biological organisms living out an existence then that is equally as interesting.

 

[Paloma]

uh oh...philosophy time:doh:

Well, because I am very mechanistic...I do believe we are all biological organisms twirling and swimming thru the primordial ooze to move the cosmos along. Yet I also believe this is linked to a 'higher purpose' for sentient beings who can choose different behaviors.

When I was about 8, I was hiding under my mom's sewing table after another beating and padre's ranting on about his desire to kill me. He was going on per usual about how I was retarded, a liar, a brat, a.... fill in the blank. I can see this moment as clear as day...one of a handful of childhood memories. I said to myself that I could believe what he was always saying and die...or I could believe that God was keeping me alive for a special purpose (ok...I was a Catholic:rolleyes:). As I got older and the brushes with death, traumatic events, incredible hardships contiued... I had to believe there was a reason why I kept getting snatched from the jaws of annihilation over and over. Some shrink might say this is overcompensation ( or decompensation??) or delusional or defence mechanism. Who cares.

I wish I could say I knew what my purpose was. Maybe it really is to open the door on this landscape of PTSD for those who need to explore it. Dunno. Maybe it is to be a tireless slave to my cat and boon companion to my dogs:rofl:

 

[Grama-Herc]

Like Paloma, I guess being told your entire childhood that you are stupid and dumb and being called a quitter has a tendency to make you wonder as an adult why you were even born.

Being told "why even try, you will just quit like you always do" creates a sense of self that is very negative.

I have always wondered why I was born. What is my purpose for being here? I wish I knew. So far, IMHO, the only good thing I have ever done was when I gave birth to my beautiful, smart and loving daughter who has given me the only grandchild I will ever have.

 

[Paloma]

you've done a lot of good here, too herc:thumbs-up

 

[helena]

Thanks Paloma & Grandma Herc,

I'm in work right now (and should be working!) but this subject is playing on my mind a lot lately.

I know from a lot of people I talk to that most of them believe in a general, non specific type of way that either there is or must be some 'purpose' to their lives.
But when I try to draw them into that a bit more they can never elaborate further.

It is not a criticism (I am the same, I don't have a clue) but I just wondered if anyone actively has realised their purpose and is doing something about it.

I have met a few people who do not believe in life having a purpose and it is always a good debate - even if a lot of people find it grim.

 

[Paloma]

It may be you don't know your life's purpose until the end of your life,if then. You may have a plan or a goal. But in the larger picture...which comes at the finish...what you planned and what you really contributed may not be the same thing. I am sure you know the scenario...someone believes their life purpose is to be a wonderful parent...or a social justice activist or... and it turns out that the down and out guy they gave $20.00 to was able to get a bus to the rehab clinic and eventually straightened out, went to school and developed a cure for cancer.

 

[anni]

Hi Helena,

If you're looking for 'votes' I'd have to say there are reasons. I'm also not sure if it would be one specific purpose or many but I think there is 'something'. I've never been impressed with the Skinnarian approach where we are all completely blank bundles of biology completely dependent on the world to invent us. Bleah.

I like the comment about being a boon companion to the cat as a life purpose. I know MY cat certainly feels that way!

Maybe we're not supposed to know what our purpose is, but are meant to take our gifts, talents and acquired wisdoms 'out there' to benefit mankind in general. That sounds annoyingly Pollyanna, I know. Sorry if it does. I've just had so much PAIN and some horrific events in my life that I think I'd just plain quit if I didn't think that maybe something I went through I could use to help someone else. I don't for a second believe any horrible events hapen to us because we're meant to go through them. There are evil people in the world who prey on others. Having been through the havoc that one truly evil man wrecked in my life, I NEED to help others. It's not a silver lining, but seems like some good coming out of the darkness.That is just how it feels to me and entirely subjective, I know.

I hope I can add, without straying too far from the thread, that one quote which has helped me make sense of this PTSD part of my life has helped me go forward. I'm not sure who it was, maybe Lewis or Menken, but the quote is that 'Evil is always in the process of destroying itself'. We're aware of the 'evil', have come through it at least breathing, and can at least maybe give meaning to our lives by doing as much good as possible.

Sorry for the simplistic philosophy, but it's just what it all feels like to me.

Take care,

Anni

 

[ISupportHer]

I tend to think that everyone has some ability to impact their own life. To do good or, if you are thinking "reason", to have some influence themselves. But also that "Sh*t happens". Things just happen in life.

I guess part of it is that if I believe that, say someone is "predestined" to cure cancer or save someone's life then wouldn't the opposite be true? That someone was predestined to suffer pain, endure loss, be in the path of a disaster or be assaulted.

Not something I can accept as a plan by any "higher power".

 

[helena]

Thanks for the responses - I actually think simplistic is good anni.

Maybe we get too bogged down with grandiose gestures of 'purpose' and relate them to finding the cure for cancer and/or achieving world peace.

No doubt some individuals have that as an agenda but for the rest of us it could be simple, everyday gestures that make a difference in someone else's life.

I am thinking this way because of something that happened to me recently that challenged my thinking. It then made me consider whether it had been a coincidence that this individual had come into my life at that very time (when I was feeling very desperate and confused) to help/guide/steer me/keep me on track ... I don't know, but it has made a massive difference to me already and will no doubt affect the rest of my life.

Was it a coincidence or destiny? Who knows but I am interested enough to want to find out...

 

[bonnecanyon]

It's hard for me to understand why bad things happen. At times I seem to be stuck mentally and emotionally as a 5 year old child - naive and trusting. Other times I can't let anyone in for fear of being hurt. I'm looking for a connection, but when that connection presents itself I run.

Bottom line, I think we are connected. What we do affects others - it has a ripple effect. So it's important to me now to smile at a stranger - who knows what kind of day they're having! To say a kind word - who know what words were last spoken to them! When I'm on the receiving end it touches my heart and makes my day a little brighter.

I guess I feel the need to do good/nice things to make up for the bad things that were done to me.....:think:

 

[Jagged Angel]

I do believe that we all exist for a specific purpose. I think sometimes that many people don't seek their purpose or even fulfil their purpose, usually due to the fact that it is hard to survive in this world and that takes up a huge amount of concentration and time! Conversely, perhaps destiny is something we cannot avoid, some people are destined to sit around and bludge on the dole all day, some people are destined to suffer the crap we all go through on this forum, and some are destined to be doctors... Just because we all have a specific purpose, does not necessarily mean that that purpose is exceptional.

I cannot tell you what led me to realise that each of us has a specific purpose in life, because I have always been a philosophical person, concerned with 'why are we here' questions at age two or three.

What steps have I taken to fulfil my destiny? This is the harder part of your questions, as how can each of us be sure that we are on the right path to fulfil our destiny? Or perhaps we are on the right path, but that this is all there is. Perhaps we actually create our own destiny - this option does not remove the idea that we all have a specific purpose, it just shifts the responsibility of that purpose from the universe/god/gods etc. to the human. I am currently a university student looking down the barrel of a PhD, and I know that this feels right, I know that this is my future, I know that the universe is smiling at me and saying 'go for it!'. I feel as though this is part of my destiny, that this is my purpose, but I cannot tell you whether the universe created this for me as a pre-determined destiny (determinism), or whether it pushed me a little in the right direction and I made the choices thereby creating my own destiny (free will). I do prefer the free will choice...

I have to say, however, that the universe could have chosen a better way for me sometimes... did I really need to go through all of this to get to this point?

 

[JohnnyM53]

Excellent thread Helena!

Much I can say here.

To capitolize a bit on what Paloma stated, a story goes something like this: a long time ago, a man felt he was a failure his whole life. At the end of his life, he felt he had wasted it, felt like a failure, a loser, but he laughed thinking at least he wrote a stupid Christmas song.

It was Jingle Bells.

In my case, I see three personal purposes. To prove to myself and others that love, dreams, and all the good things in life, which include ideals, are worth living, believing in, striving for and dying for.

The second is that, although my parents were my basic abusers, I felt sorry for all of us, that no one was helping our family. No one except the people who brought us food baskets at Christmas time when they were too broke to buy stuff.

I couldn't fix my parents, who I still love very much today for giving whatever they did, and for life.

My third purpose is, I feel lucky. I worked for 33 years with the federal government, which gave me access to insurance plans for drugs and therapy, and access to promotions. So I got a few extra bucks, which I appreciate considering we were on welfare.

So I tried to not only heal msyelf, but to understand why I healed and how this damn brain and its psychology works, so that I can help whoever wants help, by passing on the helpful information I learned in therapy and in books, to those who may not be as fortunate as me, knowing that the information makes sense for most people because I tried to understand why it worked for me and others in the first place.


"Man does not create his purpose...rather, he detects it..."

1939 - Viktor Frankl, concentration camp survivor, psychiatrist and author of Man's Search For Meaning