I've been through traumas I've been through therapists and now I need help. Things are gettingworse,my family deserves better and they deserve so much better from me. I don't know what to do I don't know where to go - please help.
To begin with, you need a therapist who's worked with PTSD before, and is qualified to do so, otherwise it's a mess.
And if someone in your family isn't supportive and understanding, then they're "fair-weather" family, like I've got-- they can make things even worse, since they make you feel bad for things you can't control, and sometimes persecute you under various rationales. Like my family, who was always very abusive to me because of my condition. Like my brother, who says it's "self-inflicted" and was always very arrogant and condescending to me, treating me like less than a dog-- for example during our teenage years when I'd go with him in the car because I coudn't drive, even though I was 2 years older, he'd stop someplace and say "WAIT HERE" like commanding a dog. And he'd complain about how his friends would think that I was his
younger brother, because I rarely left the house. And even when I loaned him like $20,000 on my credit-cards so he could start his business, he didn't pay it back because he thought I didn't deserve it, even though I had no job or way to pay it back myself, and so now my credit is shot to this day.
And my older brother was even worse and more abusive, thinking he could get away with domestic violence because of my condition, thinking that I was "mentally ill" and he was perfect an super-arrogant an hateful (in fact, he had brain-damage but it was undiagnose)-- but the cops didn't care once I was over 18, saying I didn't have a right to be there-- but when I was under 18 they said it was "family autonomy."
The poor and disabled are the weakest members of society, and we tend to take the most abuse and hate, due to being the most vulnerable; so if your family won't support you through thick and thin, then
you deserve better than
them. But sometimes we don't have the self-confidence to realize it, since we're very compromised and powerless, and so fall prey easily to their influence.
You also have to be realistic about what you can expect from therapy, PTSD is the least-understood disability, and there are about 5 million people who are made completely helpless by it, while the others have some degrees of limitation from it. But in any event, your family can make all the difference in the world by making or breaking your confidence and peace of mind-- in fact that's usually what traumatizes a person in the first place, since these things usually begin in the home.
