Does it get worse before it gets better

[Kaylove498]

I haven't dreamt allot lately until yesterday. I woke up super congested and decided to take an over the counter decongestant.I don't ever take any meds because I have a fear of just about everything going wrong or hurting me.

Shortly after taking the decongestant I fell asleep and I woke up suddenly in a panic I had a very vivid dream that I could remember saying by detail.

After I woke up I called my spouse scared and talking to him. But when I woke up I just felt numb. As if I'm dead already. In the dream I had alot of my emotions I was crying and could actually feel the sadness in the dream. When I woke up though it was gone I felt nothing.

I took more decongestant before bed and once again had very vivid dreams. Dreams that I could feel emotionally but once again when I woke up I felt nothing.I feel numb physically and emotionally.
I thought the dpdr had gotten to it's worse a few weeks ago but this just feels worse.before I could cry here and there and now nothing.part of me is starting to actually believe I'm in some type of purgatory.
When I woke up this morning I felt so gone that I started becoming scared that what if I don't realize what I'm doing and I become like those people that are missing and I just roam the streets not knowing what anything is including myself.
I stopped obsessing over the physically feelings and thoughts that I have with dpdr, but now I really just feel gone like I have no control over my thoughts or movements. So what if I do get up and my body just starts moving and I have no memory of it. I still know my name where I live the important stuff. Now I just feel gone and I'm starting to believe I am dead.
I pinch my skin all the time. I try distracting myself from these numb feelings but I can't seem to get it out of my head that maybe I have finally lost it.
Could the decongestant have taken these feelings worse. Is there something that will help me return to my emotions?

 

[Friday]

+ Several kinda of decongestants cause vivid dreams as a side effect. (Some are so well known for it that people overdose on purpose to cause hallucinations while awake - Robotripping.)

+ Having a fever causes both vivid dreams & sometimes hallucinations whilst awake (Fever dreams).

+ Being sick causes foggy thinking & emotional instability.

+ Having PTSD causes disassociation & dysregulation (emotional instability)

= Honey. You’re sick. Of COURSE everything is worse, right now. Push fluids, take your meds, eat soup, rest up... and in a week or so you’ll be back to baseline PTSD stuff, with the illness & medication side effects removed. Until then, expect to be tired, cranky, unable to focus, zoned out, slow, sore, 8 kind of miserable, and all the other wonderful :wtf: symptoms of being sick. That’s super temporary. It’s not your PTSD getting reset to a new level of bad. It’s just being sick adding it own level of ickyness to the equation.

CAVEAT - Whilst treating cold/flu symptoms = a faster recovery? Sickness = a maaaaajor stress on the body. Taking medicine to “cover up” cold/flu symptoms so you can go about your day (work, socializing, etc,) pretty much guarantees that you’ll get a great big ole PTSD smackdown as soon as you start recovering from the cold/flu. That, in my experience, lasts about twice as long as the stupid cold/flu did. FAR better to take your meds, feel better, and call in sick to work / life. Stay home, rest, push fluids, massive self care... for 2 or 3 days. So that your stress cup doesn’t overflow. So that when your cold/flu is over? You don’t lose a week or two to PTSD, but can just return to your life, feeling better.

 

[Kaylove498]

Thank you I know I over react. That made me feel way better though.