Does your t talk to your dissociated parts?

[Deleted member 35429]

For those with structural dissociation and dealing with parts in therapy, does your T address your parts directly? For example, does your T acknowledge a child part is there and sometimes ask to talk to protector part or adult part?

My T is always talking directly to adult me, regardless of who is front and center. It is offensive and makes them feel invisible. It's bewildering for my young one and really pisses off the protector. I feel he needs to acknowledge the parts and make them feel heard. I think he feels that is encouraging splits. I can't get him to change this. He's such a stubborn T sometimes. Very frustrating.

 

[Crow]

My T will start out saying "I want to let that <little one, protector, teenager> know that I ......" Sometimes if the part is fully in the room she'll ask direct questions. Her voice gets much softer and she chooses her words carefully. It helps and validates when she includes the parts in any way.

 

[anonymous]

Good question, I'm not sure. I just know that she's earned my part's trust and they like her and feel safe. I don't know if she talks to them directly.

 

[UnicornSightings]

I don't do parts therapy but would feel crazy tbh if I talked about parts of myself. Would make me feel like I have split personalities. Maybe your t doesn't want to encourage you separating yourself. Ask if there is any benefit to him wanting to do it his way.

 

[zoie33]

I have DID and yes he does speak to my parts. He has also asked to speak to different parts if they are willing. Before starting EMDR he also always asks who wants to come along for the ride. I was in denial for awhile and still sometimes question my parts but his acceptance certainly helps.

 

[Sideways]

My current T is happy to speak to who ever is fronting, and will ask who she's talking to when she's not sure, because it helps her to communicate better if she knows who she's talking to!

I'm coming from the background of having had a T who refused to acknowledge my parts, and yeah, there was a couple that found it infuriating. They came out specifically to try and communicate with him, and when that was met with "I'm talking to the same Ragdoll as always"?

That blew up really adly for me and that T. It doesn't always end that way I'm sure, but I would definitely talk to your T about his approach, and why he's approaching your parts that way.

Because, while we have parts that don't trust each other, they're not gonna be mad keen to let anyone else speak for them. And since my parts represent disconnected parts of me, refusing to acknowledge them in the way they need to be heard is tantamount to refusing to acknowledge parts of me.

Plus, most of my parts need therapy, so I need a T willing to help all of me.

 

[Teamwork]

Who is here today, who am I speaking to, is that ( insert name he knows), I can see ( insert who he thinks he sees) is trying to say something or is interfering, if he wants to come out and speak to me directly I will. Sometimes he says he welcomes everyone to the table and I struggle to know what he means. He mentions by name those he knows are struggling. Not to talk to them but acknowledge there need. Will sometimes say ask inside, this or that person knows the answer.
If I was in therapy and the t didn't acknowledge what was for me and wanted to make it what was comfortable for him in spite of how I actually live my life I would find someone else. It would be too much of a struggle, because it is already a huge struggle.
Also he treats us all with respect, because in the end it teaches me to respect all , even the prickly ones or hard to get along with ones.

 

[zoie33]

I totally agree @Links. My T is actually the one who has taught me how to communicate with and respect and thank all of my parts.