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Dreams -- Irrealistic Or Not

  • Post starter Post starter p-no
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Today there was a new show on a German tv station. It's called "The Perfect Wedding Dress". Well, I happened to switch channels and ended up there. I watched it a bit and realized that I would like to get married. I should put "again" at the end of the previous sentence because I was married once. But although I was married factually, it was not at all what I consider a good relationship and marriage.

I would like to find a partner who is kind, empathetic, has Theory of Mind, who has his own life and wants to share that with me. "Wants to share it" meaning he will actually initiate contact, things to do, naturally participate in everyday life, all areas that are part of that. Someone who will see me, my boundaries, and if he doesn't, will ask. Someone who will take seriously what I say. Someone who actually wants something from me, wants closeness with me, and I'm not talking sex only. Someone who likes reciprocity and is willing to give and take. If I ever found such a person, I would like to get married to him somewhere by the sea in Ireland, if that were what he'd also like. I'd like to share that with him only, without any friends or family. If he had different wishes, I would like him to express those and we'd find a good way for both of us. There are so many options.
 
I dream that my daughters husband will not go psyco on her and respect the restraining order and not have a ugly divorce. I hope he still has his job even though he got arrested and it will keep him from brooding.

I dream that my daughter will get an apartment where she wants to get one and the girls can stay in their schools and not have to change schools.

I dream that my daughter and her girls will be safe and sound.

I dream that I will get some respite from the caregiving for my husband with dementia. I need home health care and will have to start the process tommorow.

I dream that my daughter will be able to go back to school and get her degree so she can get a good job.

I hope her husband dissapears and moves back east with his parents.
 
Realistic or not, I really only have one dream and I have never shared it with anyone so I am a little nervous but here goes...

I dream of living in a cottage in the countryside near a babbling brook lined with weeping willow trees. There I would have several gardens; a fairy garden, a butterfly garden, a vegetable garden, an herb garden, and a rose garden. I would have a walk through with statuary and wind chimes and also a meadow of wild flowers and tall grass where my grandchildren could play. I would have an Irish setter, horses, cats etc.

I would marry a beautiful woman. In the winter, I would sit by the fireplace, read, drink herbal teas, do wood carvings and make stained glass sun catchers etc. I would live happily close to the earth/nature finding pleasure in the simple life. I would die peacefully at home surrounded with family and friends.
 
I dream that my daughters husband will continue to stay away and leave her alone. I dream she will be moved into a apartment close by so her daughters will not have to change schools. I dream that she will be in her own place before six months. I dream that I would be able to pay to hire movers for her to pack her up and move her.
 
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