Escalation After Triggers: Right Away Or Later On?

[2notbedefeated]

"fin"

I certainly relate. For a long time I could not put things into words either. In fact I didn't know what was going on inside me for a long time. I guess I'm blessed that this therapist goes the "nth" mile for me. I was seeing him 3x a week when the flashbacks and stuff where flooding over me. These were taking control and I was such a mess that I didn't even realize at tje time that I needed to talk about safety and trust issues with him.

I don't no how long you've been seeing this counselor/guide, but if after 4-6 months you are not comfortable and don't feel safe to even discuss that you can't move beyond the point you are currently at, is it possible to see another counselor? I know sometimes we don't have much choice, but it's a thought. Money doesn't grow on trees in my yard so I have to make sure I'm getting what I need. My hubby, kids, and even myself (however its hard to think I'm worth the effort) deserve someone who knows my struggles and can help. They need to know what their doing or they can make things worse.

No pressure, but I know because of seeing 3 other therapists before finding the one I now have, two of which could only take me "just so far" because their experience didn't fit my struggles. They were actually re'traumatizing me and treating like my abusers. My current therapist pointed that out to me. This helped to relieve my self-blame, "it's all my fault and problem syndorme."

Do you feel this is happening to you too with the counselor you have now?

You are worth getting someone who works well for you! Your life and healing, (plus money - I hate to keep making that an issue) deserve it!

I have never been aggressive with making sure my needs were getting met but I am learning. It's scary, and groiwng pains in this areas sometimes hurt when stretched, but once I began to do it, I felt better about myself and my situation.

Here's a **hug**

One other thought, have you asked your therapist what "model of therapy" she uses in treating her clients with PTSD, and how much experience does she have with it? How many clients has she seen with PTSD and your other issues?

 

[fin]

hey 2not...

she has seen ONE other person with PTSD and that was brought on through child birth, and she has written a paper on PTSD onset through childbirth. PTSD doesnt even come close to being a speciality...I know she has experience of other mental health issues... but it isnt coming across well now

I am Complex PTSD and I am her first like this...and I hate to say it but all through the 3 months she took to assess me I was cool and wanting to believe and really had no reasonn not to... but now...she just sounds and looks like she is completely out of her depth.

I want to be wrong...I really do and Claire in my "trust issues" thread suggested that maybe I am trying to avoid dealing with any of this and am trying to put up barriers ... But I really am not, I know Im not... I am sooo not and I dont know how to convince anyone of that (but I guess I dont need to perhaps.)

Oh, yes I did ask, I asked what "Branch" of therapy (I couldnt remember the word) and she smiled and jokingly said..."what books are you reading?"!! and I got no answer...everything I have read in what books I could get hold of and what I have found here or elsewhere and EVEN the NHS "NICE" guidelines (yes they really are called that!) well everything I have read contradicts what she has said and done in the last two weeks since finishing my assessment.

Apart from my support worker who helps me to get out and isnt trained at all to hear any of my stuff but still hears it every now and again...well this forum has been the only support I have had...this is the first time I have "met" any one else with PTSD and feel like I am not extra crazy on top of the C-PTSD (if you know what I mean). If I try to talk to her about triggering or anything...no idea...I could give you a list...we havent even begun treatment yet!!! this is maybe making me somewhat more crazy (I may be using that would too loosely here at the moment)...

And she has just started to talk down to me and I dont really respond to that very well. I keep thinking perhaps she is doing it deliberatly to see what my response is but I really dont think she is.

Oh and when I did ask her what her experience was and I wasnt rude I was really carefull how I phrased it ...she was taken aback was I doubting her ability to do her job ?, "she did well at university- did I want to see her certificates? She went on for a few minutes and I felt crap about asking... I kind of coped with it ok and then when I got home I freaked,
And thinking back about it now...how would she expect me to cope with my shit...when she
personalises me just trying to check that this is the right person , that this person and I can do this.


thankyou for the **hug

**hugs back at ya 2not

 

[Mina]

Hi, Freya -

For me, it's both. And it's funny you should ask that question right now! On Tuesday one of my bosses and I were verbally fighting at work, and it got fairly heated. He was blaming me for something that wasn't my fault, not listening to anything I was saying, and trying to steamroll over me in the 'discussion' - all of which tend to trigger me. I vented to our receptionist after I left his office, and again to my DH when I got home, and thought it was behind me. Even went to the movies and had a nice time. Then when we got home, I started fighting with DH and was acting really upset and odd. I essentially showed my triggered signs many hours later.

Someone brought up a good point about using different coping mechanisms at different times. Sometimes the ones I tend to use are not an option...when I'm at work, I can't just shut down and figure it out and cry. I had to get on with my workday, so I guess I just dealt with it as best I could in order to get me to 5:00.

Other times my reaction is pretty immediate, and you can practically just sit and watch me snap into triggered mode, lol.